My Wife Just Said… #95
“Just had a cup of piping hot tea with milk and gourmet honey. All is right as rain now. All the world needs is a nice cup of tea.” [sigh] -Elizabeth ““ Previous “My Wife Just Said…”
Tissues & Tampons
My entire family just went down with the flu at the same time. It was like a horror movie, one by one we fell. My wife was the last one standing. For a while, she even deluded herself that this would be one of those movies where one character gets out alive, to reflect on […]
My Wife Just Said… #93
“Ohmygah… [cough] my fever’s so bad… feels like my boobs are hardboiled.” -Elizabeth Mmm. Flu season was never this sexy. Or something. ““ Previous “My Wife Just Said…”
My Kid Just Said… #16
“If I twist my penis, I can fwy up in da sky.” -Lucas (3 years old) Get to da choppah? My first response to this statement was… a lot of silence, followed by a lot of hrghnck (the strangled sound of poorly-restrained uncontrollable laughter). I was reminded of bits in cartoons where characters used their […]
Senior vs. Baby
C’mon. It’s true. No disrespect to the elderly (or babies)! We’ve all got parents, or grandparents, that are old””except for Ryan Seacrest maybe, I’m still not convinced he’s human even if I can’t prove it. Don’t talk to me about his bellybutton, it was probably surgically added later. But I digress! Admittedly, being elderly has […]
New Year’s Deep Thought
If you had a rough year, just remember: Tomorrow eats today and poops out yesterday. Thanks to everyone for making it less rough for us. Happy New Year! -Charlie & Andy
My Kid Just Said… #14
[Christmas morning] “Whu’s dat? A pwesent? Fo MEEE??? Whu’s in it?” [1 minute later] “I can’t open da wapping. It keeps wipping. Oh WOOK! TWAINS!!!” [.0001 seconds later] “I wead da ‘stwuctions and you buiwd it, okay, Daddy?” [100 minutes or so later] “It’s not wook wight, Daddy. Hewe ya go. You can have da […]
Pac-Man Christmas Wishes
May your holidays be loaded with power pellets, bouncing fruit and joy…sticks? Nom nom nom, Charlie & Andy ““ Facebook Arcade Game? Imagine what a quarter-gobbling black hole Facebook would be if it were. Instructional Diagrams Learning, minus all the learning, but plus all the fun.
My Wife Just Said… #91
“I did one of those purchases. Where it turns out it’s the wrong thing but I just can’t bring myself to tell them so I buy it anyway. So yeah. It was a Christmas album. And yeah, I’ll be returning it later.” -Elizabeth ““ Previous “My Wife Just Said…”
Eagle Rides for Toddlers!?!
Your pants and undies may be safe watching this, but you will crap in your soul for sure. (Reassuring spoiler: happy ending. Sorry about the spiritual poop mess part, though.) In the Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit, giant Eagles play majestic animals that swoop in to the rescue. Um… yeah… this is not […]
