The Ways a Toy Can Suck for a Parent
Now that most of us have made it through the gift-buying bonanza of the holidays, you might be saying to me, “Gee thanks! You could’ve posted this BEFORE my holiday shoppageddon!” To which my reply would be, “Hey! I was busy buying toys that I’ll regret or suffer through, too!!!” Plus, even if I had […]
Santa Claus vs. Pregnant Woman
[ click the image to enlarge ] In our Versus series, normally we’re all about pointing out the striking similarities between a baby and unusual figures like a zombie, Godzilla, a redneck, etc. But today we’re taking a look earlier, before a baby is even born. A pregnant woman. And Santa Claus. We know […]
Christmas Tree… Dog???
You can do something so right… that it becomes wrong. Right? But maybe it’s not wrong. Hmmmmm. People can go crazy on the holidays. Christmas trees so tall that they bend over under a ceiling, like Shaquille O’Neal in a VW. And maybe there are some menorahs around with so much chutzpah that they can […]
Baby Sleep Positions: “The Neck Scarf”
When the cold weather hits us parents””b-r-r-r-r-r!””what better way to stay warm in the chill of night than, uhhhhh… to wrap your head and neck in the warmth and comfort of… your baby? Yeah, no one’s buying it, we know. But, hey, it happens. Whether we want it to or not. Maybe your sleeping […]
0 to Baby in Sixty Seconds
(News from Don Rob.) I’ve heard some moms-to-be say they wish their pregnancy would “last forever,” they love it so much. Which is a touching, yet alarming statement, especially if you happen to the be the father. Eh-hem. Some women are in the NSM camp. Not so much. They’d pay in limbs to fast-forward through […]
Breastfeeding…
Photo by: Daughter of the Sun Um, so… We don’t know exactly what’s going on here, but we’re pretty sure it involves breastfeeding. And that it’s all natural. Maybe too natural? Or something. Sorry, I was looking at the photo again. Um… Anyway, we didn’t put a punchline or caption specifically so you could come […]
New Hazard Signs for Parents
Anything in life is dangerous. Parenting is no exception, in fact, it’s more like a lens that magnifies danger by a factor of a bazillion. For those of you not familiar with the numeric value of a “bazillion,” just know that it’s about three quarters of a double infinity. Don’t worry! We’re not trying to […]
Mad Science, Potions and Cat Food
My son, Lucas, recently reminded me of something from my own childhood. Though oddly, something has happened to a lot of these memories of being a kid since having kids. The perspective of parenthood can shed a really different, very bright light on memories. My parents gave me a very free hand as a kid. […]
My Wife Just Said… #37
“Oh God! Gimme your water! Ow! Potato chip shrapnel going down my throat!” -Elizabeth
The Calories Burned by Parenting
It’s the holidays. Yay! We’ve all been double-fisting massive quantities of amazing food into our faces. Waistbands are beginning to groan in protest of the holiday splurging. Maybe some of us have nursed our guilt hangovers with super-protein-food-green-substance drinks, or spritzes of vinaigrette instead of avalanches of blue cheese dressing, it doesn’t matter. You get […]
