My wife texted (cause that’s a word, right?) me this video from home yesterday. It all becomes so much more real when you see the heartbeat or watch them move. My little boy is bouncing around in there somewhere. He’s growing and developing. Most of the ultrasounds have had ample placenta covering his face, but […]
Disclosure: This post is brought to you by the masters of personal cleansing comfort, Cottonelle. To see how Cottonelle Toilet Paper and Cottonelle Flushable Cleansing Cloths can practically change the destiny of your bum, click here. By the time we begin to have kids, we’ve been pretty thoroughly acquainted with the act of “tidying […]
The Internet is like a giant pool. Unfortunately, embarrassing pictures can be the online version of a really grody “warm spot.” Worse yet, you really can’t take pee out of a pool. Some pictures of you can be as thumb-suckingly bad as yearbook photos, except nowadays they can happen every week or day or […]
We moved the weekend before last and everything has changed. Especially us. When you live in places without children of your own, there is no permanence. Having kids, no matter where you reside, anchors you to time and place like nothing else. I saw the pregnancy stick read positive in one apartment. I watched my […]
This goes against the code at howtobeadad.com: never provide useful or important information, least of all instructions on how to do something. Correctly. So I’ve added in how to do be a total box of chocolate-covered douche-peanuts as well, to even things out. Also, I figure since this isn’t exactly a major parenting or world […]
One apartment. That’s where this took place. I can’t even believe it. And now we have another one of these joining us in December. Can love be divided into two? Or will it just multiply how much I can love… So much more to tell you, but I’m too tired to type. I will tell […]
Some people experience buyers remorse as they are buying something. Sucked into the inescapable gravitational pull of the purchasing process, maybe they feel they’ll look like a moron or worse, a poor person, abandoning items in front of store clerks and their fellow shoppers. Always watching. Always judging. “Ooooooo you grabbed a pack of size […]
[Said to my parents] “It’s both of your faults. Him.” [Referring to me] -Elizabeth We all exploded with laughter at the way she’d put it. Later that night, I stared at our 4yo son running around in circles as he stuck his tongue out and screamed gibberish. I turned to Lizzie, hugged her and […]
Dear Finn, Tomorrow is your 4th birthday. You’ll be 126,182,881 seconds old and, as such, you deserve a prize for dealing with the stupidity of people older than you, listening more to me and your mom, and learning to have fun in the most obscure ways I’ve ever seen. You have grown these past twelve […]
We all know how that expression goes: Feed a toddler a fish, and she won’t eat it; teach a toddler to fish and you’ll wind up dancing at a ball. Or something like that. With little kids, this applies to making the bed, of course, and so many other things. Like all of them. All […]
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