How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

My Wife Just… Bought a Dog!?… #225

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“We are NOT naming the dog ‘Zombie Laser’!” –Elizabeth VOTE ON OUR NEW DOG’S NAME BELOW! (No joke)   We’ve been talking about getting a family pet for years, and we finally decided to not let our dreams be dreams and JUST DO IT, to get a family dog. We’re getting him today actually! A […]

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The Pinocchio Complex

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A small boy with matted brown hair and small, painted blue eyes sat on a shelf looking out a window into the night sky. The black expanse above him stretched as far as all of his dreams stacked end to end. The boy tugged on his marionette strings and felt their threads pulling on his […]

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Dad “Body-Doubles” for His Wife’s Pregnancy Photo Shoot

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I’ve seen some touching, beautifully-captured photos of the rising dawn of a pregnant woman’s belly. Apparently so has imgur.com user druishprincess69, who took pregnancy photos into his own hands… or um… his own belly. You see, when his wife said she didn’t want to do maternity photos, he hired a photographer and posed for MANternity […]

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Vine Picks: That Happy Family, Clayton Farris & Robby Ayala

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We’ve been spending a bit more time on Vine, Periscope (@HowToBeADad) and Instagram lately. Facebook was fun and then someone decided you shouldn’t be able to see all of our posts. Twitter is getting a little muddy, and they can’t even decide on a CEO. Google+ might or might not be going away. So that […]

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You Don’t Have to Cook S’mores Like a Caveman

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You may have already realized, we’re not cavemen anymore. We’ve come a long way from rubbing sticks together spastically or throwing bones into the air like we just don’t care. We’ve got apps for that. What you may not have realized, is that we no longer need to cruelly limit ourselves to the rare times […]

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21 Things I’m Nervous About With My Son Going Into Kindergarten

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My son starts kindergarten in less than two weeks. I’m feeling a little pantspoopingly nervous about it, if I’m being honest. The worst part is when I look for resources on preparing for Kindergarten, the articles usually state or start with “stay calm.” I WAS ALMOST CALM UNTIL YOU SAID THAT. Those articles with lists […]

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“Monkey Bars” : Convos With My 4-Year-Old

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They cautiously study and probe some new strange thing. A ladybug marches across a branch with giant, observing eyes glued to it. They watch some unfamiliar activity from the sidelines. A mob of other kids is sized up with sideways glances as they run around randomly with a ball. Watching your kid, as they push […]

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We Stopped Dreaming About Tomorrow

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I was very mediocre at science growing up. I had the odd chemistry set. I enjoyed physics, more than almost any other field. I was just not a great junior scientist. But I had great respect for the endeavor. I wanted to know the answers to life’s questions. It seemed as though a combination of […]

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20 Brutal Things Kid Say About Our Appearance (Gee Thanks, Kid!)

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Our readers are awesome. These are THEIR stories. Who needs Photoshopped magazine covers or Hollywood’s gratuitous scenes of hard-bodied celebrities who inexplicably need to shed clothing to give you crippling insecurity about your body and physical appearance when you’re a parent. You have a live-in demotivational speaker with absolutely zero percent filter and 100% oversharativeness: […]

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My Wife Just Said… #224

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“I’m outnumbered.” -Avara   I think my wife wakes up some days to the stark realization that she is surrounded by dudes at home. This situation lives in contrast to the sentiment of thinking we were having a girl the first and second go-arounds. I don’t think she envisioned a symphony of farts and stunts in […]

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