How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

The Perfect Dad Shoe Doesn’t Exi-

Posted by , under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS


The Perfect Dad Shoe New Balance Crocs Fanny Pack

“The perfect shoe for a dad doesn’t exi-”
[record scratch] Well it does now, kiddo!

After extensive minutes of scientific analysis of countless dad clichés and stereotypes, The Perfect Dad Shoe™ is hot off the manufacturing grill! A masterful fusion between sneakers and clog sandals.

That’s right! Yard work in the front, barbecue in the back.
 

The Footy-Pack™ (Patent Pending)

The Perfect Dad Shoe Footy Pack

Let’s take a closer look at the revolutionary accessory that makes The Perfect Dad Shoe™ even more superior than its already vastly superior superiority over any other shoe.

Fully detachable, consider the Footy-Pack™ an optional expansion to your cargo short’s carrying capacity. Great for small useful items like spare batteries, reserve napkins or a mini utility knife tool.

Heck! Throw some spare change in there and add a jingle to your step when you trot out onto the field for your fatherly back pat of encouragement.

​”I’m appalled,” you say? Hi, Appalled, I’m The Perfect Dad Shoe™! 😄

 

7 Comments

7 Responses to “The Perfect Dad Shoe Doesn’t Exi-”

  1. I think they should be sold with a pair of dad jeans. Perfect pairing.

  2. Michael Pollack says:

    I have often joked that the holes in these type of shoes are to allow your dignity to seep out, but damn, as a 40+-year-old white male dad with 3 teens I would wear the hell out of these shoes

  3. Rick says:

    They already make the perfect dad shoe. It’s called the Nike air Monarch. Check it out. https://m.facebook.com/groups/1559899167364297

  4. Jacob Hunter Gagnon says:

    Can these be ordered, and if so where ?! Please I need the link.

    • Andy says:

      They can’t be ordered because I made them up in Photoshop. Maybe some shoe maker will see this post and make them a reality one day. Ya never know!

  5. DadSeth says:

    Andy u dick. Really wanted a pair

    • Andy says:

      Haha! I feel good/bad whenever I fake someone out that they have to question if something exists or not. So yeah… I’m a dick. 😉

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