How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

The “Uh” Scale of Men

Posted by on May 2nd, 2013, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

The Uh Scale of Men Funny Chart Uhhhhhhh

Even if we never really think about it, we all know words can mean different things by the way they’re said. Don’t believe me? Okayyyyyyy. See? Not only did I acknowledge your response, I also said, “How many times were you dropped on your head as a child, you moron.”

I’m not sure why nobody ever teaches anyone this great stuff, but it’s probably something similar to the reason a kindergarten teacher would have trouble explaining to parents how well their little Johnny is doing with his burped alphabet.

Don’t underestimate the power of the economical squeaks and grunts of speech, though. Even if they’re not acceptable in a game of Scrabble, they can be blank canvases that we can stretch or color with our mood.

When you know how the length and tone of words can influence their meanings, well you’re practically like the Rembrandt of talking at that point okay! DuuUUuuUUuuh.

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12 Comments

12 Responses to “The “Uh” Scale of Men”

  1. Nick says:

    Again my wife just shakes her head as I laugh to one of your posts. But she know as we’ll as I that women have their oooown scale.

  2. Kevin says:

    I’d extend this to include what happens when it gets an M on the end, and when that M is extended to include pursed lips and/or furrowed brow. Probably means different things for different people, but from me it means “I’m not ready to tell you to call a mechanic, but you should call a mechanic”

  3. zoesmuse says:

    and people say you can’t tell tone from text. ha! I say.

  4. Laurie says:

    Good to know!!

  5. Jo says:

    LOL. Have you been talking to my husband? ;)

  6. Danielle says:

    There should be an “Ugh” scale for “Crap, I forgot my mother-in-law’s birthday dinner is tomorrow night and I already promised my buddies that I would go see the new Superman movie with them” or the “I should NOT have eaten that sandwich I found in the office fridge”.

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