A Guide to Extreme Flu Preparedness & Response for Families
Being sick sucks. However, it is the Seventh Circle of Suck when you have kids, or your kids are sick, or it’s an all out family-demic.
Good news is: there are steps you can take. Bad news is: I didn’t include any of the helpful ones you should take to prevent or deal with sickness in your household. Whoopsie!
If you’re a parent who’s presently in bed, surrounded by moaning kids, sitting in snow drifts of snotty tissues, I hope this made you laugh (without coughing up a lung). Aaaaaactually, I don’t mind if the lung thing happened so long as you laughed. Consider Instructional Diagrams your own personal LOLzenges.*
Stay healthy, everyone! And if you mess that up, board yourself up in a room, cut out a feeding slot in the door and fire up the Internet. KITTENS!
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Potty FAILing (A True Story)
If you’re a germaphobe, you probably shouldn’t read this.
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23 Comments
23 Responses to “A Guide to Extreme Flu Preparedness & Response for Families”
I would agree, the tunnel from ET was pretty dang cool!
Totally dang cool!
Add head lice and you’ve got my household nailed!
Nope, Mollie has is way worse than me!
Arg! That sounds… bad.
Made me think of the time three of my five family members were puking in the same bowl at the same time. Ew.
I must apologize. You see, that’s supposed to be awful, but… I am beyond fascinated at the mental reconstruction of that scene. WOW! Ha ha! Holy shhhhhhhhhared puked bowl!
Oh, I still laugh. Mostly because I wasn’t one of the three. And partly because cleanup was relatively easy compared to the awfulness it could have been.
I’ve already added about two or three familiy members to your family in my imagination just to make it even more epic a visual. But, I’m glad you weren’t involved in the Fill the Punch Bowl extravaganza.
I thought the bling on the gloves was there to stop the kids to wipe their snotty noses on them,and spread the pandemic… Thats what I’d use em for anyways lol..
You see? You’re already improving on the idea. Brilliant.
So bedazzeld and made of a dark fabric. Dried up snot leaves its mark,that way you see what you are dealing with..
One more thing to equip your surroundings with,a black light.
Making your home look like a cheap stripper bar will provide you with scientific proof of evey bit of bodily fluid spread around.
Its also a great tool for when raising a boy and proving to him his aim needs practice..
juliette you are a genius! never thought of that. thnx
Awe shucks.. Feel free to use it in the next guide..
As a single Mother of 3 (1girl 16 2 boys 11 and 6)
I needed to develop survival protocols that would defeat zombie level outbreaks .. My knowledge is all yours to share if only to help a parent not to stay up 4 days in a row picking ip puke..
We’re in the 2nd round of 7th circle of suck at our house. I’m experiencing my first sinus infection + double ear infection of my life. 3 yr old has barking seal cough. Husband out of town entire week. Cat just threw up in the bedroom and nanny is on vacation. Don’t want to know what 8th circle of suck feels like.
Um… wow. My entire family went down and all my coworkers, so I feel your pain, even if the stories are different. I hope this Instructional Diagram made you stick your tongue out at the horror and laugh a bit.
8th circle of suck must be where we’re at- four cases of Type A flu (They didn’t confirm which specific strain- but I’m thinking “Martian Death.”), at least two secondary respiratory infections, a teething infant, and suspiciously healthy and overactive five-year-old.
I think the five-year-old brought it home from preschool. She had it two years ago so I think she’s immune….that or she paid off the flu fairy with leftover Halloween candy.
Wow, that is pretty funny! I will never ever be able to think of Tissues now without tampons. Tissues and Tampons was such a good name! It is SO SO cold where I am, not to mention still digging out of 3 feet of snow and there is just too much sickness every where! HATE the winter!
Oh wow! The Tissue and Tampons compliment has my eyes all wide with pride. ::blush::
I should be really thankful for Southern Californian weather when my family gets sick, but I still piss and moan like a toddler. Ha ha!
My sinuses are revolting against me. And what’s worse is they’ve enlisted the help of both my inner ears. Sinus infection + a double ear infection! (not awesome) Someone said try some Bourbon but I’m not so sure? Isn’t that just for a cough? The antibiotics they put me on are bigger than my iPhone and surprisingly get better reception. Or maybe thats the Bourbon? Plus my husbands been on a work trip all week long. Hurry up and get home honey. Mommy’s barely holding it together;0 (my last FB status)
take a garlic clove (I’m french,so I’m not sure the term is good)and slice it so it fits your ear drum,but not to lose it in there. Keep it as long as possible. Fresh garlic is a very very powerful anti everything. The garlic oil in it should kill whats having a viral or bacterial party behind your ear drum,desolve it,and the pressure of those gone,your pain should be gone tommorrow. Works for me and my kids,and it’s a trick my Dr gave me since I had cancer and have lupus. (aka no immune system)
Anyways,you smell like crap but who wants to get that close anyways lol
Sinuses,eucalyptus oil. pure,be careful it could irritate skin,specially the lil ones.
On a cotton ball,sniff it. Sinuses melt,but clear up lol
For the kids,eucalyptus .. suppositories. I know.
But it works. And for adults too lol
I laughed so hared that snot and tears were running comingled down my chin. I’m still laughing so hard that snot might run into my mouth if I don’t stop typing to wip
It’s a little odd for me to say, but I love your comment so so much. Hang in there!