How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Baby Sleep Positions: “The Neck Scarf”

Posted by on December 13th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Baby Sleep Positions: The Neck Scarf

 

When the cold weather hits us parents—b-r-r-r-r-r!—what better way to stay warm in the chill of night than, uhhhhh… to wrap your head and neck in the warmth and comfort of… your baby? Yeah, no one’s buying it, we know. But, hey, it happens. Whether we want it to or not.

Maybe your sleeping baby wraps you in a boa constrictor of cuddliness like The Neck Scarf, or goes lower when latching onto you, possibly as low as some kind of leg warmer of love. When it happens you tend to wake up and start imagining a referee counting the seconds you’ve been pinned by your little snoozing wrestler.

Sometimes you stay asleep when your baby flops on top of you. In this case, it’s likely you’ll wake up from something like a tiny finger being jammed to the brain up your nostril, a toe finding a home in your belly button or the tickle of sweat dripping off the super-heated part of your body that’s been given a toasty slumber-hug for the past hour or so. Joy.

Stay warm and well rested, folks! If that’s even possible.
 


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36 Comments

36 Responses to “Baby Sleep Positions: “The Neck Scarf””

  1. Christina says:

    More like wake up with the urge to pee and realize…oh crap…how am I getting out of THIS one?

  2. I always respond to such moves by switching positions with said baby(ies). When I see them turning purple from not being able to breathe because of my weight, I let them crawl back to their own beds. Yeah. I’m one tough daddy.

  3. Amy Gulli says:

    The worst part of getting into this position is when the baby first slams his head into your face, thereby cracking cartilage in your nose and forcing you to strangle the curse word you were about to scream.

  4. Dax says:

    I’ve always seen this move my son makes, as The Suffocator. And if it was morning he would wake me with the toe-curling smell of a diaper full of whatever we ate last night…

    It’s easy to come out of. Stop sit-up en he roll’s off your face. Do not forget to catch..

    • andy says:

      This is true. It doesn’t even require coverage of the face to be called The Suffocator, provided the diaper load is particularly biological in its warfare.

  5. Phil says:

    Further proof that they’re out to kill us.

  6. Carrie says:

    And they say co-sleeping is dangerous for babies…us parents are the real ones in danger!

    • andy says:

      I can testify that I’ve never hurt our kids in bed, but have myself been brutalized regularly. Ahhhhhhhh, if they weren’t so damned cute… we’d eat them. ;)

  7. Stephanie K. says:

    Braelyn ends up sideways every single night. The part ^we get YO be surprised about is where on the bed, or us, she ends up! Lol this morning she was hanging off the edge of the bed, half laying on the bed. Pretty much amazing :-)

  8. Tracy says:

    Looking back, the neck scarf was sort of nice when my son was an infant. Now he’s three and will sleep with my husband or I when he’s sick. The he becomes a 35lb meat blanket.

    So that’s fun…

  9. Mish says:

    Our boy likes this one, but he often gets up a bit higher; my husband calls it the ‘meat hat’.

  10. Monica says:

    I haven’t experienced this one before but my son like to do a combo of the “H” and Snow Angels.

  11. DadOfTwoBoys says:

    I’ve experienced this just once. My oldest had draped his legs over my head as I lay sideways. As I was asleep, I was only alerted to their presence when his heel so rudely decided to wake me up by hitting my face.

  12. frano85 says:

    Ha ha ha

  13. Mollie says:

    Ooh – had this one with my almost two-year-old this morning. Queen size bed, just the two of us, and she insisted on blocking my airways while singing her ABCs. Just precious.

  14. MamaJessie says:

    ROFLMAO @ meat blanket. Stealing it.

  15. Oh. My god. This is exactly, EXACTLY how my son sleeps on me when we go camping.

  16. Terry says:

    Just know that co-sleeping is very dangerous for infants who cannot roll over. These may seem funny, but when a sleeping parent rolls a leg or arm over the child, the baby can quickly suffocate. Until they can lift their head and roll over the need to sleep alone in their own crib or basinette. Let’s be sure everyone knows that!

  17. LOL! This position was the one that banned co-sleeping in our home.

  18. mo says:

    LOL. this is my 2.5 year old’s favorite way to sleep. Gotta love the crick it puts in your neck

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  20. Combaticus says:

    Our son is almost 5 and I still get this one almost daily. You guys rock, by the way.

  21. Kellie says:

    Seriously what’s with the Debby Co-sleep Police Downer on every post?! First of all, it’s HUMOR. Second, it is safe when done properly no matter the age and third-go make your own parenting decisions with your own children and let the rest of us do our own research and make our own decisions! We get it-you don’t approve. Thanks. Now move on!

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