How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Dad Uses His Kid as a Human Drum Machine (VIDEO)

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If rhythm was a language, it’s clear I’d have both a stutter and Tourette’s. I can’t tap out the simplest beat on my steering wheel, let alone my kids. So, this video is super specially especially amazing to me. It’s not okay to beat your kid… unless you’re harmlessly dropping mad beats like this dad. […]

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What It’s Like Being A Parent: Part Eight

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Last time, we described what it’s like having twins. Today, let’s talk about friendship, shall we? Friendship with kids is unlike any other kind human relationship. Between the volatility, lack of cohesive thought, and quicksilver amendments, kid friendship borders on looking like an abusive relationship with a stuffed animal. But rather than type all the […]

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Robots Will Want Babies Too

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Let’s face it. Science fiction has done a pretty interstellar job of predicting the future. Computers, smartphones, lasers, 3D printing, space travel, velcro, all fortune-told by sci-fi long long ago in a galaxy, well… right here. Of course we’ll impose our stereotypes and body-image issues onto robots, so they’re not likely to look like a […]

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“Zebras” : Convos With My 4-Year-Old

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Playing with a little kid can turn into a wild goose chase, or zebra chase as the case may be. When searching, parent’s have pretty poor vision when it comes to being able to see where the fictional characters of a toddler mind may be, so you’re completely reliant on them as your guide in […]

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3 Bad Moments in Advertising for Parents

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Advertising has hit an all-new level of weird, guys. Not only are advertisers taking over social networks and the entire internet with paid ads, but sometimes these “marketers” lack in creativity and common sense often found in the hands of thoughtful artists and publishers so much that we are subjected to some really ridiculous media. […]

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My Wife Just Texted… #191

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  A classic example of a “teacher” writing to a parent about the vital need for a child to bone up on video games. Look it’s even got two bold exclamation points!! Totally legit. When little kids fake messages from their teacher or from one parent to the other or from an imaginary pony, it’s […]

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“Car Pee Diem” : Convos With My 4-Year-Old

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The care and management of miniature humans is a tricky kind of magic to master, especially when it comes to their bathroom habits (or entire lack of any habit whatsoever). Car trips can be the ultimate test of one’s parental wizardry, since you’re traveling away from home, in foreign territory, and you’ve got to find […]

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Nostrilizers: Bad Product Idea #17

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  The world has nose plugs, ear plugs and sleep blindfolds for keeping the senses at bay. These are all so negative, though. What of the joys of life? We’ve got binoculars for our eyes, headphones for our ears and seasoning for our tongues, but what of the delights of the nose? Imagine if you […]

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Maximumble: Pajamas

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  Listen, having an imagination is serious business. We enter into this bond of pretend play with our kids, and its easy to lose sight of the fact that this fiction is FOR REAL. Ask a kid. Sometimes, they won’t be able to discern truth from the invention. And its a beautiful thing. As long […]

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Darkness – Scrabble Scribble #13

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Are you afraid of the dark? Well, maybe you aren’t anymore. Or maybe you are. Maybe it’s only after you watch a pea-soup-splosion like the Exorcist or some nutty mind job like The Ring. That movie had me doing heebie-jeebie leaps onto the bed for a couple months, y’know, in case some broken-nailed hand tried […]

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