NOTEBOOK
Commentary, experiments, failures (more often than not) and experiences in the field.
Hollywood Childbirth: Lights! Camera! PUSH!
And the Academy Award nominees for “Most Fake Birth Scene” are… all of them. A few months after I witnessed the birth of my first son, I saw my first childbirth scene as a new dad. I watched with a scrunched up, appalled expression as I realized how we’re all pretty much fed a parade […]
10 Insider Tips for Playing with Kids
Here are some tips and warnings for parents signing up for the full-contact, mind-bending sport known as Playing. I’ve added 6-second videos to each point to demonstrate more fully humorously. You can turn the sound on and off in the lower-left of each video. (Some of these get a bit festive, so you may want […]
5 Annoying Pieces of Parenting Advice
1. Arguing With Your Kid? DON’T ARGUE WITH THEM It’s so true. Maybe we could apply this same advice to achieve world peace? It’s not like we’re tired, hungry, burnt out, and exasperated. Right? 2. Kid Won’t Eat? JUST MAKE THEM EAT Also applicable: if they eat it five times they’ll keep eating it. Picky […]
Dying Dreams
He’s running motionless, his little legs seeming to slip backward, toward the monster he’s feverishly trying to escape. It’s not real. He’s standing at the jagged edge of a murderous cliff, an evil wind ripping at his Darth Vader pajamas, pulling him over. It’s not real. They’re just dreams. His nightmares. ““ The other night […]
7 Signs You’re A Parent
1. You Repeat Yourself You don’t like telling the same stories, giving repeat instructions and pleading over/over/over again that you need something vital to happen. But that’s what happens. Every day. All the time. 1. You Repeat Yourself You don’t like telling the same stories, giving repeat instructions and pleading over/over/over again that you need […]
Harry Potter and the Curious Cancer
I used to think life was a process of growing older and wiser. You put the puzzle pieces together, finding those intellectual edge pieces to the larger picture and placing them to make sense out of a 2,524,554,080 second blank jigsaw. Boys, take care of yourselves. Before you can't. I lost three close family members […]
The Magic 8-Ball of Parenting
On a daily basis, I wonder if I am doing the right thing. Am I trying hard enough? Am I listening intently enough? Am I guiding while correcting when necessary? Am I learning fast enough at this parenting thing that I can stay a few steps ahead of my own children? It feels like the […]
End of Year Whispers
Can you hear that? The new year is calling our names. He’s off in the distance, waiting for someone to answer. Like a child, he stumbles toward us as he takes his first steps. We don’t know whether to protect this young thing from itself or let him fall. Luckily, he will make his way […]
Santa Claus Photos: An Evolution
I’ve written about the majesty and major PAIN IN THE ASS-NESS of Santa Claus photos before. When I decided to display these lovely moments in time on this little blog, people claimed I was harming my son. Remember that? This is just one stone thrown my direction. You can read all of them here, if […]
What It’s Like Being A Parent: Part Eight
Last time, we described what it’s like having twins. Today, let’s talk about friendship, shall we? Friendship with kids is unlike any other kind human relationship. Between the volatility, lack of cohesive thought, and quicksilver amendments, kid friendship borders on looking like an abusive relationship with a stuffed animal. But rather than type all the […]
