INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Is there a word for the opposite of “educational”? That’s what these are. These diagrams illustrate why caffeine and insomnia don’t mix well.

How to Play Any Game with a Kid (Flowchart)

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You sit there sweating bullets. You’re not worried you’ll lose, maybe there’s a hint of worry you’ll accidentally win. You’re just trying to keep up, playing a game with this young ball of spin-cycle lightning we commonly refer to as a kid. Whether it’s your kid or not is beside the point. It’s a KID! […]



Senior vs. Baby

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C’mon. It’s true. No disrespect to the elderly (or babies)! We’ve all got parents, or grandparents, that are old””except for Ryan Seacrest maybe, I’m still not convinced he’s human even if I can’t prove it. Don’t talk to me about his bellybutton, it was probably surgically added later. But I digress! Admittedly, being elderly has […]



Christmas Tree Decorating by Child Age

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Our lives go through a lot of transformations when we have kids. Body, mind and soul. And home. And car. And bank account. You either know this already, or can easily imagine. In the beginning, Baby’s First Christmas can launch holiday excitement into the psychotisphere. “Extra efforts” aren’t made, “extreme measures” are taken. New parents […]



The 3 Ps of Parenting Clorox Bleach It Away Contest

The 3 Ps of Parenting

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Nothing can prepare you. Nothing! Just like war, no matter what you read or watch, or how many in-the-trenches stories you hear from gray-faced veteran parents, nothing“”NOTHING!!!””can prepare you for the amount of pee, puke and poop that will be unleashed upon you once your baby arrives. The 3 Ps of Parenting. Mothers may even […]



Parent Safety: Thanksgiving InnuenDON’TS

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When you haven’t eaten in a while, you get hungry. When “a while” is actually the length of time things need to fossilize, you starve! You can start smelling delicious phantom whiffs, or hear something you could have sworn was bacon joyously sizzling a second ago. It’s the same with sex. Except for the sizzling […]



The Anatomy of Make Believe (Illustrated)

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Ah, the crazy, goofy things we come up with to entertain our offspring and ourselves! They’re wonderful, but when you actually think about almost any nursery rhyme, you want to tilt your head and let out a slow, “Huuuuhhhh?” And adding hand or foot make-believe play, even though it can be delightful, doesn’t make them […]