How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Words

The Crazy Ways Kids Rename Things (30+ Pictures)

Posted by on May 27th, 2015, under SNAPSHOTS

My son walked up to me recently and asked me where the “burger shovel” was. After I was done chuckling, I asked him what he needed a spatula for. He answered, “I need your s-spaatuulaa for my pretend restaurant.” He said the word like he was taste-testing it for an in-depth Yelp review. Kids are […]

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Exposure To & Improper Use of Kid Slang May Result in Brain Damage

Posted by on May 22nd, 2015, under NOTEBOOK

Even if we haven’t said them ourselves as parents, we’ve all seen it happen, or know of a horrific story or twelve. Some of us can barely stand hearing them and have vowed solemn oaths to never say them. I’m talking about the slang words kids use today. And that gruesome moment when a mom’s […]

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Parenterms: “Excusplanation”

Posted by on May 12th, 2015, under SNAPSHOTS

When something is stuck to a wall or scattered in a million pieces on the floor, or a blubbering sibling is rubbing their head, and you ask a kid what happened? Hah! You’ll hear barely anything (if anything at all) about the sequence of events. Instead, you’ll hear a lot about the philosophical nature of […]

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Adorablized Words: A Guide to Kids’ Pronunciation

Posted by on February 17th, 2015, under NOTEBOOK

  Something wonderfully unexpected happened last week. I posted about how my 5yo says pesketti an meapbals, and a crap ton of you shared YOUR OWN kid’s adorablized words. There were so many great examples of how our little kidlets gnaw on the words they’re learning, and spit out their cute, weird or accidentally-vulgar mutations, […]

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Kid Definishons: “Pesketti an Meapbals”

Posted by on February 13th, 2015, under SNAPSHOTS

As his dad, I want my son to become very intelligent, but also as his dad, I won’t really mind if he always calls it pesketti an meapbals. One by one, though, the rough edges of our kids’ cute mispronunciations are sanded down and buffed into the smooth shapes they’re supposed to be. Bwankie becomes […]

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Darkness – Scrabble Scribble #13

Posted by on December 9th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

Are you afraid of the dark? Well, maybe you aren’t anymore. Or maybe you are. Maybe it’s only after you watch a pea-soup-splosion like the Exorcist or some nutty mind job like The Ring. That movie had me doing heebie-jeebie leaps onto the bed for a couple months, y’know, in case some broken-nailed hand tried […]

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Parenterms: “Grayllow”

Posted by on November 19th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

When “off white” is so far off that it has entered the whiteness relocation program and changed its name, it has probably changed its name to Grayllow. With any article of clothing that’s white, or close enough to wind up in the “lights” laundry pile, there’s a certain point when you can’t boil or bleach […]

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Parenterms: “Adultolescence”

Posted by on November 7th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

Adolescence refers to a person in the process of developing from a child into an adult, but the idea of what an “adult” is seems to have lost a lot of its former meaning. The more time marches on, the more it seems to skip and moonwalk, and we’re entering an “Age” where men and […]

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My Wife Just Loud Voice Said… #185

Posted by on November 3rd, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“That wasn’t yelling, that was loud voice talking.” -Elizabeth   No one wants to feel like the crappiest parent ever, but you’d think parents adored feeling that way if you judged by how often we seem to go to there. In raising kids, sometimes the pressure mounts, nerves get frayed, limits get hit, and we […]

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A Guide to Kid Fibs (Illustrated)

Posted by on July 22nd, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

The rad people at The Honest Company helped us bring you this post because DUH, honesty is the best policy.   Kids are little lying sacks of giggles. It doesn’t mean they’re evil or you’ve raised them wrong — they seem to learn it automatically, like breathing, apparently. There are all kinds of reasons kids […]

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