How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Sex

Did You Do Your Part(ner)? (Giveaway)

Posted by on February 24th, 2017, under NOTEBOOK

I partnered with Plum Organics for their Do Your Part(ner) campaign. Isn’t it romantic?   Before this Valentine’s Day swept us all off our feet (or plopped us onto a cozy couch to pass out), I teamed up with Plum Organics for my hopefully-funny Realistic Love Notes for Parents to help launch their Do Your […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 16

Realistic Love Notes for Parents

Posted by on February 8th, 2017, under NOTEBOOK, SNAPSHOTS

I partnered with Plum Organics to bring you this funny, honest look at the realities of parental romance.   There’s really only one thing that changes dramatically when you have a baby: EVERYTHING. Sure we all lose a lot of sleep, money, energy, car keys and brain cells. We don’t tend to blab online about […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 0

Netflix & Chill…dren

Posted by on June 1st, 2016, under NOTEBOOK, SNAPSHOTS

The popular slang expression “Netflix and chill” is basically what young people these days are calling a “booty call,” getting together to hook up for sex, or the prospect of it. Maybe hang out and get in a few shows if it doesn’t turn into gland-to-gland combat, I guess. Anyone with kids knows, after you […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 0

Baby Sleep Positions: “The Deflector Shield”

Posted by on January 22nd, 2015, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

A shield is up! RED ALERT! Evasive maneuvers! All hand to battle stations! (Sorry for that.) You see, once a mother ship does fire a new little cosmonaut out of her launch bay, I’m afraid a deflector shield is now quite operational. And will be for a what can seem like lightyears. In space, no […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 5

My Wife Just Texted… #190

Posted by on December 8th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

Don’t they know I want to wrestle with their mom? She always wins, of course. But that’s just because we’ve been together for almost 15 years. And she’s smarter than me. And better at wrestling. – Previous “My Wife Just Said…” What does a human jungle gym look like exactly?   Follow us on Facebook. […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 0

My Wife Just Texted… #177

Posted by on September 10th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

When you’ve got kids, the art of romance and the business of parenting can be a bit of an odd couple. The “biblical sense” normally refers to “knowing,” as in knowing each others brains out, but running a family can easily burn up all a couple’s time and energy, making it impossible to maintain anywhere […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 0

My Wife just Said… #169

Posted by on July 14th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Hey, you wanna? [Winks] I’ve been doing lots of Kegels. So I can be like a ninja down there. Not like grab arrows out of the air…” -Elizabeth   I didn’t know whether to feel afraid or aroused, but in any case it’s clear some ninja skills are sexier than others. – Previous “My Wife […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 2

Sex Terms Can Be a Total Turnoff

Posted by on January 7th, 2014, under NOTEBOOK

I’ve covered how childbirth terms can make you want to puke (view), and how pregnancy terms can make you hide under a tarp (view), but let’s go even earlier, to the very start. The very act that results in babies. Sex. Words have a depth that goes beyond their dictionary definitions. Compare telling a man […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 11

Parentopoly, The Give ‘n’ Give ‘n’ Give Game

Posted by on December 30th, 2013, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

It’s likely you’ve played Monopoly before (even if you’ve never finished it), since statistically about 11 out 10 households have had the board game given as a gift one year or another. Parenting can truly seem like a game, too. How many times do you think one parent has said, “Go, it’s your turn!” to […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 8

Parenterms: “Sprintercourse”

Posted by on November 8th, 2013, under SNAPSHOTS

Tick tock, tick tock. The clock is ticking for parents. Always. For something. Everything. Raising kids is a game show that starts with “hurry up” music playing, and it never stops. When it comes to making time to make some love, it’s so often the expendable scene that winds up on the editing room floor […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 9