Skating Through Life
As a younger man, I imagined one day I might become a father. When I dreamed of the man I would one day become, it was always in context of the child I would raise. I haven’t arrived at my destination as a man, and I may never get there, but a child has provided [...]
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My Kid Just Said… #18
“NO, DADDY! You NOT take a picture of me aaaaaany more!” -Lucas (2013, 3.5 years old) There is camera shyness, and then there’s ohpleasestopit-ness about being photographed or videoed. Some of us can really can be obnoxious Mama- and Papa-razzi with our kids. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with occasionally staging things so a [...]
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Hero for a Day
So, we’re on this insane road trip when my wife texts me a message. I’m sitting in the backseat of the car and zoning out with my earbuds. It was this image, and the words, “His words. Not mine.” All the onions. All the dust in my eyes. He gave me a gift I’ve wanted [...]
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Don’t Bring Dirty Looks to a Machete Fight
How many looks of disgust or ohmahgosh rolls of the eyes do you think this mom gets breastfeeding in public? Bingo! Not many. At least not from people with a full set of arms in their collection. You could argue that it’s because she’s a part of a primitive society and that they’re all simply [...]
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The Opposite of Politics
Last night, as the commotion was coming to an end, and my son was verging on total insanity from staying up too late, his 3-year-old mind decided to articulate a point I think bears repeating… Good luck stopping Finn from having fun. Imagine living life like that? So, let’s take this message and carry it [...]
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How To Announce Your Pregnancy & Keep Them Guessing
You should all know by now that taking us seriously can lead to disastrous results. You’ve already seen my birth announcement, right? Well, today I want to show you how I announced that my wife Avara was pregnant… and teach you how you too can create foolproof plan to trick everyone. It was April 1st, [...]
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Judgment Day Parenting
When you become a parent, with it arrives your own personal judgment day. No, I don’t mean the End of Days or a Terminator melting into a chrome knifesicle and stabbing at you. I mean, it’s the day (and it’s not just one day) that all the uppity spectators in the land of parenthood direct [...]
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Childproofing Level: EPIC
You think you’re doing a good job as a parent, and then you see THIS… I want to find the person responsible for this architectural masterpiece, stuff his pockets with all of my money and then pray to him every day for making my life better. It’s not often you can find a house that [...]
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Breastfeeding: Suck It
There has been a lot of controversy around breastfeeding lately. Retail stores have told people they couldn’t do it within their walls. Formula companies implied that formula was a better route. It’s like breastfeeding is being silently marketed as obscene or something. With all the swirling hatred on the topic, I thought my son and [...]
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The Origin of Life is Ugliness
[ click the image to enlarge ] Just kidding. Eggs aren’t gross. I suppose most stuff at the microscopic level looks that way. But I can’t help see this and think that half of life’s building blocks looks like a complicated, intricate weave of molecular material. And my half of the conception equation is just [...]
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