How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

My Kid Just Said

My Kid Just Said… #37

Posted by on December 31st, 2013, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“What if I had boobies that made milk and then they blasted off like meteors?” [Walks away] -Finn (2013, 4 years old)   My son knows the finer points of anatomy, apparently. Or maybe just how my wife feels right now? Hope your New Year blasts off like a meteor!   – Previous My Kid […]

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My Kid Just Said… #30

Posted by on September 17th, 2013, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“I wish we had brown faces. Like Isaiah.” -Finn (August 2013, 3.8 years old)   Finn was so happy and buoyant in his statement that day after school. He looks up this young boy and simply considers his best friend’s color something aspirational, if only on a simplistic level. It’s just this beautiful afterthought about […]

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My Kid Just Said… #20

Posted by on April 8th, 2013, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“Boys have a penis, girls have a diamond.” -Finn (2013, 3.5 years old)  Finn just nailed it. You’re welcome, humanity.  – Previous My Kid Just Said Stanky body odor is the pits! My Kid Just Said Facebook Page This is where YOU can post YOUR kid’s quotes. Go for it! Follow us on Facebook. You […]

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My Kid Just Said… #12

Posted by on November 15th, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

I got Finnegan’s name in the handwriting of my favorite author, Mark Twain. Click the photo to see it larger. “Dada was dat?” -Finnegan “That’s your name, Finn.” -Me “Why?” -Finnegan “Because I love you.” -Me   This is one of those interesting topics. I didn’t get a tattoo until my son was born. I […]

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My Kid Just Said… #11

Posted by on October 18th, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

[hands behind back ] “I do NOT hab poop on my fingews.” -Lucas (2012, 3 years old)  “Whuchoo got behind your back there?” (sniff) “Uhhh… What’s that smell?” There are some lies you hear that instantly tell you the truth. When someone says they don’t mean to sound a certain way or offend, you know […]

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My Kid Just Said… #9

Posted by on September 14th, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“We have to moof to Mars becaws Staturn is too beeg.” -Finnegan (2012, 2 11/12ths years old)  PS: Who the hell taught him astronomy? I’m just landing on the edge of that beautiful landscape of my son saying amazing, imaginative things. I’m Ponce DeLeón and I’m discovering the fountain of youth. It’s so awesome. And […]

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My Kid Just Said… #8

Posted by on August 28th, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“My peepee is shiny.” -Finnegan (2012, 2.5 years old)  I’m waiting for him too announce this fact to strangers like his dad. The simple truth is he’s right. Our peepees do get a little shinier after we clean them. And that’s partly why we’re so attractive to future mates. Shininess. Maybe I should tell him […]

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My Kid Just Said… #7

Posted by on August 21st, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

[Sigh] “I feel so relaxed. Like I just peed.” [Everyone bursts out laughing] “What!?! It makes you feel relaxed!” -Max (2010, 10 years old)  Relaxation Level: Max. We all voiced our agreement by laughing even harder. He was right! It’s true. It’s not something you talk about over tea and crumpets. Or ever really. Still, […]

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My Kid Just Said… #6

Posted by on July 24th, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

[Lucas (3yo) looking at a picture of himself] “Da’s Wucas!” Me: “No, you’re supposed to say ‘that’s me.’” [long pause accompanied by scrunchy nose of disapproval] “No, Daddy! It not yooOooOooOU! It WUCAS!” -Lucas  Dad, you sound like you think you know what you’re talking about, but I do not think that you do. I […]

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My Kid Just Said… #5

Posted by on May 30th, 2012, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

[Seeing his mother dying her hair] “Mommy… does you have poop on you head?” -Lucas (2012, 2 years old)  Uhhhhhhh… To a kid: if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it must be a duck. So if it looks like poop… Yeah, Lizzie was wearing a plastic cap […]

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