Tag: How To

Boot Camp for Feeding Kids

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

We partnered up with Gorton’s to bring you this post because we feel your pain, parents. Also because of the bazillions of fish sticks my kids and I have gobbled up.   There are all kinds of boot camps to prepare for extreme challenges or achieve difficult goals. Feeding kids clearly fits these points, so […]



6 Awful Fit Failures of Pants

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Lee Jeans and HowToBeADad.com have joined forces to bring you this light-hearted infographic because we both know the world is a happier place when your pants fit.   There are plenty of helpful size and fit guides online, from simple charts to artificially-intelligent virtual assistants. While everyone has their fit preference, and it’s good to […]



10 Insider Tips for Playing with Kids

Posted under NOTEBOOK

Here are some tips and warnings for parents signing up for the full-contact, mind-bending sport known as Playing. I’ve added 6-second videos to each point to demonstrate more fully humorously. You can turn the sound on and off in the lower-left of each video. (Some of these get a bit festive, so you may want […]



The Spitty Thumb

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Birds do courtship dances without a single lesson. A spider knows how to spin a web without ever having seen one. In much the same way (except not as nasty as spiders), I believe the Spitty Thumb is an action pattern that’s genetically coded into parents. It has its stimulus. Kids. They’re absolute schmutz and […]



I don't give a … a lesson in grammar and numbers

Properly Not Giving a ####

Posted under NOTEBOOK

  WARNING: This post contains a lot of swearwords. If that offends you, click here.   Most heroes are too cool to care. (Watch a musical video aid.) Everyone has said they “don’t care” in one way or another at some point or always. It can be used for good, as if to declare emotional […]



An Honest Guide to Repacking a Product

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Faulty products, misguided impulse buys, kid rejection, whatever; sometimes life gives you lemons. But you paid hard-earned money for those damn lemons, so you’re not just gonna sit there with a puckered-up face and bear it. You need to make a return. Sadly, before you can make an exchange or a return, you can’t just […]



Old Yeller Parenting

Posted under NOTEBOOK

With the wild success of The Daddy Complex’s “CTFD Parenting” and a multitude of other parenting philosophies variously titled with animals names, military equipment and dance moves, we think it’s time we got in on this lucrative moneymaking scheme. Today, we submit to you: “Old Yeller Parenting.” No, we don’t shoot our kids, you lunatic. […]



Guide to Trick or Treating

A Guide to Being Tricky or Treaty

Posted under NOTEBOOK

This goes against the code at howtobeadad.com: never provide useful or important information, least of all instructions on how to do something. Correctly. So I’ve added in how to do be a total box of chocolate-covered douche-peanuts as well, to even things out. Also, I figure since this isn’t exactly a major parenting or world […]



Tech Tip Timeout Computer Lag

Tech Tip Timeout: Computer Laaaaaagggggg

Posted under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

You may be wondering why I’m bestowing this tidbit of purely technical wisdom upon the visitors of our parenting entertainment website. Sure, it’s useless and silly, so that fits, but what about the parenting angle? Welp, what doesn’t technology have to do with parenting in this chromed-out, touch-screened world? It’s scary, but it has nearly […]



Performing a Proper High Five so You Too Can Be Cool

Posted under NOTEBOOK

High fives are part of a whole, wonderful family of interactive gestures that are important  to relating to your fellow human beings or your offspring. And being cool. I’ve been terrible at performing high fives and being cool all my life, so I took upon myself to research and develop a set of instructions for […]