How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Funny

My Wife Just Said… #189

Posted by on December 1st, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Are you okay there with him? Can you look after him while you work?” -Elizabeth   Obviously my answer was, yes. Yes, I could look after him. When you’re doing some of your work from home, or doing the things around the house that sure as hell aren’t going to do themselves, kids never make […]

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“Chicken Phone” : Convos With My 4-Year-Old

Posted by on November 28th, 2014, under EXTERNAL USE ONLY

When you’re trying to write something or think up some great concept, consulting a child’s boundless random imagination seems like a mad idea that’s so mad, it just might work! Well… then there are mad ideas that were so mad, they just really didn’t work at all. Subscribe to ConvosWith2YrOld to follow the series. (Liking, […]

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Thanksgiving Pie Chart

Posted by on November 27th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

If Thanksgiving only lasts a day for you, you didn’t make enough food and you are a monster. With refrigeration and proper storage, it really should be Thanksgiving Week. Maybe it’s not pie you go bonkers for, it could just as well be a completely bone-littered turkey platter, or a clean-scraped bowl of marshmallow yams, […]

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Peanuts – Scrabble Scribble #12

Posted by on November 25th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

  You don’t want your head to explode trying to hold it in, but you know it’s wrong to laugh. And that, as a result, they’re just going to say it over and over for a month and in all the most public or inappropriate places. Even knowing this, though, sometimes your can kids say […]

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“Bed Time” part 1 : Convos With My 4-Year-Old

Posted by on November 19th, 2014, under EXTERNAL USE ONLY

Ahhhhhhhh bedtime. Most new parents are surprised to discover that bedtime isn’t a specific point in time, but a theory, really. It’s more of a hypothetical range, starting with PJs and a bedtime story, and dragging a good distance across the face of a clock to conclude much later at deep, ragged sigh of relief […]

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Parenterms: “Grayllow”

Posted by on November 19th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

When “off white” is so far off that it has entered the whiteness relocation program and changed its name, it has probably changed its name to Grayllow. With any article of clothing that’s white, or close enough to wind up in the “lights” laundry pile, there’s a certain point when you can’t boil or bleach […]

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My Wife Just Said… #187

Posted by on November 17th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“[Blah blah blah blah blah blah] …can you tell I’ve been alone too much today.” -Elizabeth   I was listening the whole time. The whooooooole time. Which was a really long time. I swear was listening, though! I’m not saying I didn’t run my hand through my hair or rub the bridge of my nose […]

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Grand Theft LEGO – Bad Product Idea #16

Posted by on November 13th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Two fanatically popular video game series join forces to create, the crossover video game of the century, Grand Theft LEGO… “Derivative but so inspired…”— someone who probably needs a good dictionary   Race through the mean streets of Downtown LEGO City with your friends or just slap C4 on their backs, send them off and […]

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Parenterms: “Adultolescence”

Posted by on November 7th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

Adolescence refers to a person in the process of developing from a child into an adult, but the idea of what an “adult” is seems to have lost a lot of its former meaning. The more time marches on, the more it seems to skip and moonwalk, and we’re entering an “Age” where men and […]

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Memos to the Tooth Fairy

Posted by on November 5th, 2014, under NOTEBOOK, SNAPSHOTS

My 5yo son’s wiggly-jiggly tooth was recently liberated from his smile and he couldn’t wait to write a pillow-bound note to the Tooth Fairy. Here’s the text (uncorrected, to preserve the cuteness): Dear. TootH. Fairy. i Love you. My tooth FeLL. out. i wANt presents. tHANk you.   Short, polite and to the point. Adorable, […]

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