How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Food

My Wife Just Said… #326

Posted by on August 7th, 2017, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

Sometimes we put off things, kidding ourselves that they won’t be so bad when we do them later. HAH! I’m not sure how we fool ourselves into these utter interplanetary flights of fancy. Maybe it’s that our distaste for a task is so extreme that it gives us the delusion-fuel we need to con ourselves […]

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Drama, It’s What’s for Dinner (Video Compilation)

Posted by on July 28th, 2017, under VIDEOTAPE

I can’t personally remember being an absolute douchecanoe about food when I was a kid. Then I thought this might be some kind of self-imposed amnesia our bodies perform, because if they didn’t, we might not procreate as a species if we had crystal clear memories of the little horrors we were. So, I asked […]

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Watches Food Network Once…

Posted by on April 19th, 2017, under SNAPSHOTS

It’s always been true that parents struggle with feeding their kid, at least in one way or another. We want them to eat healthy, sure, but once some of us realize what savagely picky food critics our kids can be, we occasionally downshift our standards, and just concentrating on getting them to eat. ANYTHING. But […]

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My Wife Just Said… #309

Posted by on March 27th, 2017, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

My wife and I have been together for almost 17 years. We share a lot of common obsessions and interests. Sure, we diverge on certain topics but who doesn’t? This weekend proved to be a realization of our secret, hidden obsessions. We finally came clean with each other about our love for pie crust. Pie […]

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I’ll Have a Large Childhood Memory with a Side of Chili, Please

Posted by on February 2nd, 2017, under NOTEBOOK

I am participating in a sponsored campaign hosted by Nexium 24HR. I received compensation for this post. While all opinions stated are my own, I make no claims about Nexium 24HR as a product or its effectiveness. Use as directed. May take 1-4 days for full effect.   I had an odd request for my […]

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Toddler’s Guide to a Banana

Posted by on January 31st, 2017, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Bananas, ‘nanas, nanners or whatever you call them, are often referred to as “nature’s perfect food” because they’re loaded with such good nutrients. Their perfection becomes even perfecter for parents because they can be toted around in a purse or bag as portable, unrefrigerated rations that are actually good for a kid to eat. However, […]

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Vote For Pizza!

Posted by on November 8th, 2016, under NOTEBOOK

It’s Election Day! Hopefully you’re out there voting or already have. Whatever anyone’s political party or views are, I’m sure we can all agree that this election has been an emotional roller coaster ride through a carnival freak show. In light of that, I want to give you a break from the grim seriousness of […]

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16 Absolutely Gag-Inducing Halloween Food Creations

Posted by on October 7th, 2016, under SNAPSHOTS

None of these are going to be cute lil’ pumpkin-shaped cookies or “spoOoOoOoky” cupcakes with chocolate bat wings. Presented here are only the most absolutely gruesome Halloween dishes that even a zombie might need to cover its eyes sockets to swallow. Kids are picky enough eaters, so I’m not so sure any of these are […]

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If Parents Renamed Products Honestly

Posted by on August 30th, 2016, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

If some brands wanted their products to really speak to parents, they’d probably need a name makeover. Let’s look at a few products with new names and logos that might not be more appealing but are certainly more accurate.   Pregnancy Test Bread   Classic View-Master Toy   Lunch Snack   Granola Bars Slide Whistle […]

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My Wife Just Sniffed… #279

Posted by on August 22nd, 2016, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

I’m not sure if all the organic food my family buys seems to go bad faster than non-organic because it actually does or because of the demonic laughter I can hear taunting me from the empty void in my bank account. Whatever the case may be, my wife is a little bit very extremely cautious […]

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