How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Food

My Wife Just Sniffed… #279

Posted by on August 22nd, 2016, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

I’m not sure if all the organic food my family buys seems to go bad faster than non-organic because it actually does or because of the demonic laughter I can hear taunting me from the empty void in my bank account. Whatever the case may be, my wife is a little bit very extremely cautious […]

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Kids & Food Don’t Mix (5 Comics)

Posted by on August 2nd, 2016, under SNAPSHOTS

When you can casually browse the internet and see pictures of kids in other countries horking down grilled tarantulas like it was eight-legged candy, or see them slorping up spicy curry dishes that you’d need to freeze a roll of toilet paper to endure the after-effects of eating, it can make you wonder how in […]

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Passing 3 Childhood Cereals On To My Son (Video)

Posted by on July 19th, 2016, under VIDEOTAPE

Sponsored by General Mills Cereals. Our little son hasn’t tried many cereals. It’s mainly because one of his favorite hobbies in the world is not trying any new foods at all costs. As in our grocery costs. Ugh. So, when the little guy pushes a depressingly full plate of breakfast away or comes back from […]

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The Carrot Whisperer Dad (Funny Video)

Posted by on June 3rd, 2016, under VIDEOTAPE

Getting kids to eat can be like trying to play a video game in Impossible mode… blindfolded… while wearing boxing gloves… and obscenely drunk. This dad figured out a cheat code to beat the vegetable level of his cute kid’s appetite. An amazing glitch that’s so simple, it’s glorious. You don’t need to know a […]

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Taking Kids Out to Eat (4 Maddening Comics)

Posted by on May 18th, 2016, under SNAPSHOTS

Dining out with the kids is a weighed decision. Or a lapse in sanity. On one hand there’s mixing up what’s for dinner and a much appreciated break from cooking and dishwashing. On the other stress-palsied hand… there’s the total disaster of the circus clown act your kids become at a restaurant table. Fowl Language […]

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The Future Is Now: French Fry Vending Machine!

Posted by on March 18th, 2016, under VIDEOTAPE

Lots of us complain endlessly about the state of the world. There are so many things, today, that make absolutely no sense. Will my kids ever sleep through the night? Why don’t we have hoverboards yet? Who is this orange man running for President? Why can’t I drink my own pee? Well, maybe not that […]

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Pizza Is Its Own Food Pyramid (3 Comics)

Posted by on March 1st, 2016, under NOTEBOOK

When I was a teenager, I could eat an entire large pizza by myself. Not a (violent air quotes) “large” pizza, but an honest-to-hugeness LARGE pizza. It took time, of course. And probably a violation of the laws of physics somehow. Heck, I love pizza so much, I once flew back from New York with […]

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My Wife Just Said… #253

Posted by on February 22nd, 2016, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Why’re you sticking!!!”   Son: “What???”   “I was talking to the pan.”   Son: “But… but the pan is not alive.”   –Elizabeth & Our 6yo   It’s funny that he was calling her out for talking to her cooking equipment, because an hour earlier was having an energetic discussion with a stick. They […]

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You Can Lead a Kid to a Meal… HAH! (3 Comics)

Posted by on February 4th, 2016, under SNAPSHOTS

…But you can’t make them eat. Admittedly some parents get a little too obsessive in one way or another about their kids nutrition, but even for laid back parents, it can be absomotherf*ckinglutely infuriating! [Sigh] I’m calm, I’m calm. Happy place. Deep breaths. Let’s laugh away the pain with these 3 Fowl Language Comics from […]

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Baby’s First Bacon

Posted by on December 29th, 2015, under VIDEOTAPE

Apologies now to my vegetarian friends, but I think we can all agree that there are similar foods that produce the same effect for you… Listen, we try to eat healthy in our house, and only introduce new foods with our kids when they’re ready, but there are many who would gladly give their kids […]

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