How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

An Online Event Like You’ve Never Seen Before

Posted by on March 28th, 2014, under NOTEBOOK

This is an online event unlike anything you’ve been part of before, or anything we’ve EVER done. It’s going to be insanely amazing. Insanzing? What happens when you combine $2,500 in Twitter party prizes, a custom movie poster grand prize giveaway AND audience-driven nearly-live improv comedy hosted by former SNL cast member, Rachel Dratch, for […]

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Maximumble: Is this your punishment or mine?

Posted by on March 27th, 2014, under EXTERNAL USE ONLY

  This comic has me wondering if its creator, Chris Hallbeck, is pretty much a psychic or some kind of wise man. I know I’ve leveled privilege-removing threats at my kids and been mentally praying to myself that it works, because if it doesn’t… ugh. So much more work. It’s like a bluff almost. When […]

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The Evolutionary Progress of Kids’ Games

Posted by on March 26th, 2014, under EXTERNAL USE ONLY

Listen, I’m not one of those old men sitting in his boxers on the porch spraying people with a hose as they walk all over his lawn. Okay, fine. I am, but with that completely aside, are kids today too coddled and catered to? I think the answer is “yes” and now I have unequivocal […]

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My Batkid Just Said… #42

Posted by on March 25th, 2014, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“Weww… I din’n’t actuaw-wy save da city.” But you saved me. “Why?” You just did. “Oh!” [Runs off smiling] -Lucas (2014, 4.5 years old)   He’s such a well-mannered little superhero. It’s funny to think that our kids will never really know how much they saved us. Even when they have their own kids, I […]

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My Wife Just Said… #153

Posted by on March 24th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

[Explaining to our littlest son how trees eat] “Well… The roots are like the mouth of the tree… And I guess the leaves are like… the butthole?”” -Elizabeth   Maybe my wife isn’t the most knowledgeable gardener, but she’s my absolute favorite gardener.   – Previous “My Wife Just Said…” When your kid is asleep […]

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My Son Is a Loser

Posted by on March 21st, 2014, under NOTEBOOK

We sit bobbing in the pool like pale apples waiting to be plucked. My son is crying into his flotation device and I am expectantly staring at him. This is not going as well as I’d hoped. “This game is boring and dumb. I hate it.” He’s over it. I’m treading water, literally and figuratively, […]

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An Alphabet According to Kids

Posted by on March 20th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Books and learning products for toddlers and kids can easily give one the idea that our children are being groomed for a future in farming or a jungle expedition. Some of the things chosen to represent the alphabet can be a little random and a lot a bit irrelevant. If you were learning a new […]

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My Kid Just Said… #41

Posted by on March 19th, 2014, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“I was dreaming of crushing.” -Finn (2013, 4 years old)   Earthquake damage in our house. The earthquake had just hit on Monday morning and I was on the other side of our house. I ran to my son’s room in about two strides. He was fine, and Avara made it to the room too. […]

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3-Year-Old Ninja Caught on Video

Posted by on March 18th, 2014, under EXTERNAL USE ONLY

When I was about ten, I created a home-made pair of nunchucks. I sawed a broomstick into two short kid-ninja-sized handles and then, using screws, attached them together with a short chain. After about five minutes of practicing, I was certain that the authentic Japanese word nunchaku must have been defined as “self-inflicted head trauma.” […]

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Teddy Bear – Scrabble Scribble #5

Posted by on March 14th, 2014, under SNAPSHOTS

  It took a simple doozy from my four-year-old the other day to point out that I’ve fully operated under the belief that teddy bears are always dudes for as long as I can remember. I suppose that all stuffed animals are male unless they’ve got a bow, long eyelashes or syrupy shapes embroidered all […]

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