How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Hypo-kid-dria (How Kids Present Illness and Injury to Parents)

Posted by on August 30th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  [ click the image to enlarge ] We’ve shown you a mother’s hypochondria (fearing the worst of a child’s illness or injury) with Hypo-mom-dria. With our Hyper-dad-dria illustration, we completed the parental picture by showing you a dad’s “put duct tape on it and walk it off” style of failing to see anything wrong. […]

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Chocolate-Chipless Chocolate Chip Cookies Recipe

Posted by on August 25th, 2011, under NOTEBOOK

Cooking with your kids is fun. Baking is funner. Why? Because it’s all the fun of cooking without the stress of hot pans, flame and sharp blades near or in the hands of your children. FYI, burns and open wounds can seriously blunt the enjoyment of good family times and the satisfaction of a teaching […]

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My Wife Just Said… #24

Posted by on August 24th, 2011, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“You do realize, because of your iPhone Facebook app, I see your forehead more than your eyes.” -Elizabeth  

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Save The Gummy Bears!

Posted by on August 23rd, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  Each year, tens of millions of gummy bears are decimated by those who are blissfully unaware of the impact of their voracious appetites: CHILDREN. HowToBeADad.com feels it is our responsibility as parents and ecologically-minded individuals to help replenish this threatened community. How can you help this majestic creature? Much like their distant cousin, the […]

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Two Beds, or Not Two Beds…

Posted by on August 18th, 2011, under NOTEBOOK

Two beds, or not two beds, that is the question. To sleep separately, perchance to dream… I’m a side sleeper. At least that’s how I fall asleep. Apparently the way I land and spend the rest of the night is a more varied and active endeavor. Lizzie has informed me repeatedly that I actually sleep […]

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Booger Nutrition Facts

Posted by on August 16th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

We wrote about the controversial topic of booger eating before, but because of wild public demand we decided to showcase the dietary considerations of boogers as an Instructional Diagram. What are boogers made of? Is it okay if you or your kid eats them? Will they cause sickness? Or blindness like some old people say? […]

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My Wife Just Said… #22

Posted by on August 10th, 2011, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Hello?” [on her cellphone] “Oh! I’m calling you. Uh. And you’re right in front of me. I need some sleep.”-Elizabeth  

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Bad Product Idea #4: Pixie Choosie Uncommonly Exotic Baby Foods

Posted by on August 9th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

[ click the image to enlarge ] No one knows what foods their baby will take to, and some babies can be crazy about their appetites and tastes. On one hand, you can’t seem to feed them anything except a few items, and on the other, they’ll cram the strangest things into their faces without […]

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Brain Failure on Aisle 9!

Posted by on August 4th, 2011, under NOTEBOOK

When I go shopping, something happens. I enter some magical space-time distortion, where time oozes and store aisles and racks shift around like the stairs at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, along with accompanying little goblins that move around the products I’m looking for in some kind of demonic three-card monte of retail. The […]

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Redneck vs. Baby

Posted by on August 2nd, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  [ click the image to enlarge ] Sometimes the truth is unpleasant. Sometimes it slouches and belches and hollers and stares us straight in the face with half-lidded eyes. Observing your baby, or someone else’s, can sometimes leave you with a puzzled and slightly alarmed crinkle in your brow as you witness behavior that […]

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