How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Hyper-dad-dria (the flip-side to Hypo-mom-dria)

Posted by on May 31st, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  [ click the image to enlarge ] Back in the day (about two months ago), we created a diagram called “Hypo-mom-dria” as a play on the hypochondria some mother’s get into with regard to their little ones. It illustrated the alterations that can occur between what is really seen and what is mentally perceived. […]

Comments: 59

Homemade Birthday Cards: Cody’s 1st, 2nd and 3rd

Posted by on May 26th, 2011, under SNAPSHOTS

You could ask my boys, “What’s it like to have a designer for a dad?” Lucas would point to his head and say “bonk,” but that’s just because of his limited 2-year-old vocabulary and his passion for headbutting the world at large. Cody and Max would probably say “Birthday cards!” … Or “Coffee!” but you […]

Comments: 12

Universal Birth Reaction Assessment Tool

Posted by on May 24th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  [ click the image to enlarge ] Fact. Moms have a monopoly on pain when it comes to child birth. There is a medical chart called the Universal Pain Assessment Tool that doctors and nurses use to gauge it. Sure, it’s stupid and useless. But what about dads? Dads deserve something stupid and useless, […]

Comments: 106

The Call of Nature!

Posted by on May 19th, 2011, under NOTEBOOK

The older boys, Max and Cody, and I headed out for a hike on the weekend. About 5 minutes in, the blazing eye of the sun microwaving my neck reminded me that I didn’t bring any sunscreen. But, as I explained to Lizzie later (as she applied aloe), there is a difference between forgetfulness or […]

Comments: 19

Bad Product Idea #1: Flashy Finn Baby Pomade

Posted by on May 17th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  Ah, pomade. Who could forget that slick, wavy helmet of hair of yesteryear! Well, what could be wrong with adding some James Dean allure, taking your baby to 11 on the cuteness Richter scale? Yes. A lot of things could be wrong with that. But the exploration of how far “wrong” can go is […]

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7 Tips for Sleep-Deprived Insomniacs

Posted by on May 12th, 2011, under NOTEBOOK

Insomnia is one of the most perverted jokes life can play on parents who are getting horrible sleep. It’s like getting nauseated at the sight of food even though you’re starving to death. Cruel are the hours, with the little one asleep at last, when all is quiet and dark and you find yourself in […]

Comments: 46

“How Not To” Instructional Diagram: Baby Carriers

Posted by on May 10th, 2011, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  It has been said that “for every way to do something right, there are a thousand ways do it wrong.” Instruction manuals tend to concentrate on how-to’s, but trust us, the ways you can do or use something incorrectly is far more interesting. Whether it’s helpful is really secondary at How To Be A […]

Comments: 25

Blind Hula Hooping (First Time I Was So Proud That I Got Mad)

Posted by on May 5th, 2011, under NOTEBOOK

Sometimes you experience such a strong emotional response to something that it’s kind of upsetting when others are around and you fall so short of the mark. After a long day at the beach, the family decided that going to the pier was a better way to handle our hunger than shaping sand into the […]

Comments: 27

Baby Reading The Paper

Posted by on May 4th, 2011, under SNAPSHOTS

  “Wow, they finally found Waldo! In Pakistan. Who would’ve thought…” “Thanks for the backrest, Sasquatch Legs.”

Comments: 7

My Wife Just Said… #10

Posted by on May 4th, 2011, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“I just got cayenne in my eye. Again.” -Elizabeth

Comments: 4