How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

“MY WIFE JUST SAID…”

You just can’t invent the stuff that comes out of a woman’s mouth once she’s “passed a watermelon through the pinhole,” ceased sleeping and is married to you. Or one of us.

My Wife Just Said… #168

Posted by on July 7th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“That moment when you start humming a song while getting your toddler dressed when he asks what song it is, you realize it’s ‘Push It’ by Salt-n-Pepa and say, ‘Sorry honey, I don’t remember the name.’ Yeah, that just happened.” -Avara   We don’t shield our kids from every little thing but there are certain realizations […]

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My Wife and Kid Just Said… #167

Posted by on July 1st, 2014, under "MY KID JUST SAID...", "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

Wife: “No, I don’t have a penis. I have a vagina.”   Son: “A bagina? Where does the pee come out???”   Wife: “There’s a… hole.”   Son: “In you butt?”   Wife: “No, the front… The fluffy part.”   Listening to my wife, Lizze, and my youngest son Lucas (5yo), I wanted to laugh […]

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My Wife Just Said… #166

Posted by on June 23rd, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Looks like Arden took a dip in my gene pool. #littleoldmanbaby” -Avara   The question of where a child’s looks come from is a big one for parents-to-be. After Finn was born, people said he looked like me. I assumed he might look like one of us. I mean hopefully, right? But when we learned we […]

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My Wife Just Texted??? #165

Posted by on June 16th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

There are the occasional times when we leave our phones unattended and unlocked. I’m not referring to myself here, since people have joked that my iPhone and earbuds are part of my body’s anatomy, but for other people it happens from time to time. Of those times, mischievous people sometimes get a hold of them. […]

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My Wife Just Instagrammed… #164

Posted by on June 9th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“This is us. Frozen washcloths all daynightday long. Two teeth down how many to go???” -Avara   Last week, it was surgery. This week it’s four teeth coming in at the same time. Are they the same thing? Not quite. But this kid has been through the ringer. Two teeth have made their jagged entrance so […]

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My Wife Just Texted… #163

Posted by on June 3rd, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

Sometimes my wife, Lizzie, knows just what to say to me. Even when she doesn’t know it. They say “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” but some ways of getting there are much faster than others. PIZZAAAAAA!!! – Previous “My Wife Just Said…” Kid faces only a mother could love. Follow […]

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My Wife Just Said… #162

Posted by on May 26th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Can someone please help me understand why toddlers insist on making faces like these in every photo?” -Avara   There is a scale of learning when it comes to kids taking photos: 1. No idea what’s going on 2. Realize someone is pointing something at you 3. Making a face because you are asked 4. Making […]

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My Wife Just Texted… #161

Posted by on May 19th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

  My phone lit up by my side as I was working late. I read the text and knew it probably meant that the part of my 4yo son’s mind that manufactures nightmares was also working late. I made an awwww face as imagined the little guy stumbling with drowsy desperation to our room, to […]

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My Wife Just Said… #160

Posted by on May 12th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Want to know what I’m doing for Mother’s Day? Taking a nap. Peace out.” -Avara   She knows what she wants, kids. That about sums up what I’ll be asking for this Father’s Day as well. – Previous “My Wife Just Said…” Kissing: Is it just eating other’s faces off?   Follow us on Facebook. Stay […]

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My Wife Just Said… #159

Posted by on May 5th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“When they kissed in old movies, it looked like two people fell into each other’s faces and just stopped. And now it looks painful, like they’re trying to eat each other’s faces off.” -Elizabeth     Every once in a while my wife and I will turn our heads slowly and exchange looks, in response […]

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