How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

“MY WIFE JUST SAID…”

You just can’t invent the stuff that comes out of a woman’s mouth once she’s “passed a watermelon through the pinhole,” ceased sleeping and is married to you. Or one of us.

My Wife just Said… #171

Posted by on July 29th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Okay. Honey! The toilet and I just became best friends. Let’s take it easy on the romance.” -Elizabeth   The flower of romance can bloom suddenly in the rays of spontaneity. Or it can hit a very firmly closed bathroom door. There’s a time and place for everything, and sometimes “the mood” needs to take […]

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My Wife Just Said… #170

Posted by on July 21st, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Out at dinner. Arden’s having the special.” -Avara   It’s as if my baby boy knows exactly what to do when someone looks at him or takes a picture. He burns so brightly from inside. Lit from within. And shines through the eyes. A while back I wondered how different Arden would be from Finn. It’s […]

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My Wife just Said… #169

Posted by on July 14th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Hey, you wanna? [Winks] I’ve been doing lots of Kegels. So I can be like a ninja down there. Not like grab arrows out of the air…” -Elizabeth   I didn’t know whether to feel afraid or aroused, but in any case it’s clear some ninja skills are sexier than others. – Previous “My Wife […]

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My Wife Just Said… #168

Posted by on July 7th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“That moment when you start humming a song while getting your toddler dressed when he asks what song it is, you realize it’s ‘Push It’ by Salt-n-Pepa and say, ‘Sorry honey, I don’t remember the name.’ Yeah, that just happened.” -Avara   We don’t shield our kids from every little thing but there are certain realizations […]

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My Wife and Kid Just Said… #167

Posted by on July 1st, 2014, under "MY KID JUST SAID...", "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

Wife: “No, I don’t have a penis. I have a vagina.”   Son: “A bagina? Where does the pee come out???”   Wife: “There’s a… hole.”   Son: “In you butt?”   Wife: “No, the front… The fluffy part.”   Listening to my wife, Lizze, and my youngest son Lucas (5yo), I wanted to laugh […]

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My Wife Just Said… #166

Posted by on June 23rd, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Looks like Arden took a dip in my gene pool. #littleoldmanbaby” -Avara   The question of where a child’s looks come from is a big one for parents-to-be. After Finn was born, people said he looked like me. I assumed he might look like one of us. I mean hopefully, right? But when we learned we […]

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My Wife Just Texted??? #165

Posted by on June 16th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

There are the occasional times when we leave our phones unattended and unlocked. I’m not referring to myself here, since people have joked that my iPhone and earbuds are part of my body’s anatomy, but for other people it happens from time to time. Of those times, mischievous people sometimes get a hold of them. […]

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My Wife Just Instagrammed… #164

Posted by on June 9th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“This is us. Frozen washcloths all daynightday long. Two teeth down how many to go???” -Avara   Last week, it was surgery. This week it’s four teeth coming in at the same time. Are they the same thing? Not quite. But this kid has been through the ringer. Two teeth have made their jagged entrance so […]

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My Wife Just Texted… #163

Posted by on June 3rd, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

Sometimes my wife, Lizzie, knows just what to say to me. Even when she doesn’t know it. They say “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” but some ways of getting there are much faster than others. PIZZAAAAAA!!! – Previous “My Wife Just Said…” Kid faces only a mother could love. Follow […]

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My Wife Just Said… #162

Posted by on May 26th, 2014, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Can someone please help me understand why toddlers insist on making faces like these in every photo?” -Avara   There is a scale of learning when it comes to kids taking photos: 1. No idea what’s going on 2. Realize someone is pointing something at you 3. Making a face because you are asked 4. Making […]

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