INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS
Is there a word for the opposite of “educational”? That’s what these are. These diagrams illustrate why caffeine and insomnia don’t mix well.
Baby Sleep Positions: “The Roundhouse Kick”
The nighttime abuse we take as parents is a testament to how much we love heading to bed with the baby on board. Co-sleeping is special or at least necessary for some, but a lot of people don’t know that it can also occasionally be a good way to get a bloody nose or [...]
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Facebook Fist Bump (FBFB)
You may feel foolish at first, but you’ll probably smile or burst out laughing. You’ll see. YOU’RE FIST BUMPING US (or each other) THROUGH THE INTERNET! And we think that’s almost as rad as teleportation. Except not as useful, probably. The Fist Bump Click to enlarge It’s easy. The FBFB can be done on any [...]
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Name that Superhero Diaper Pail!
[ click the image to enlarge ] Everyone poops. Even superheroes. Though, having been a bit of a collector in my youth, I can tell you it’s not something that you’ll ever see depicted in the colorful storyboard format of a comic book or its blockbuster movie adaptation. “Hey, Alfred! Can you hand me a [...]
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Baby Sleep Positions: “The Stalker”
It can be a little startling… You’re sleeping (at last) and you wake up for some reason. Even if your baby has the most beautiful eyes, when you wake up all groggy and see those eyes, wide open and inches from your face, drilling calmly into your soul? You might not say it, but [...]
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ChocoHead Edible Baby Helmet (Bad Product Idea #6)
[ click the image to enlarge ] All parents want to do it. We restrain ourselves. We settle for kisses and nibbles. But the adorableness of babies can be like an all-you-can-eat buffet spread out before a fashion model who just retired and broke up with her boyfriend! We all want so bad to nom [...]
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The Ways a Toy Can Suck for a Parent
Now that most of us have made it through the gift-giving bonanza of the holidays, you might be saying to us, “Gee thanks! You could’ve posted this BEFORE my holiday shoppageddon!” To which our reply would be, “Hey! We were busy buying toys for our kids that we’d regret or suffer through, too!!!” Plus, even [...]
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Santa Claus vs Pregnant Woman
[ click the image to enlarge ] In our Versus series, normally we’re all about pointing out the striking similarities between a baby and unusual figures like a zombie, Godzilla, a redneck, etc. But today we’re taking a look earlier, before a baby is even born. A pregnant woman. And Santa Claus. We know [...]
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Baby Sleep Positions: “The Neck Scarf”
When the cold weather hits us parents—b-r-r-r-r-r!—what better way to stay warm in the chill of night than, uhhhhh… to wrap your head and neck in the warmth and comfort of… your baby? Yeah, no one’s buying it, we know. But, hey, it happens. Whether we want it to or not. Maybe your sleeping [...]
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New Hazard Signs for Parents
Anything in life is dangerous. Parenting is no exception, in fact, it’s more like a lens that magnifies danger by a factor of a bazillion. For those of you not familiar with the numeric value of a “bazillion,” just know that it’s about three quarters of a double infinity. Don’t worry! We’re not trying to [...]
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The Calories Burned by Parenting
It’s the holidays. Yay! We’ve all been double-fisting massive quantities of amazing food into our faces. Waistbands are beginning to groan in protest to the holiday splurging. Maybe some of us have nursed their guilt hangovers with super-protein-food-green-substance drinks, or spritzes of vinaigrette instead of avalanches of blue cheese dressing, it doesn’t matter. You get [...]
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