How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Is there a word for the opposite of “educational”? That’s what these are. These diagrams illustrate why caffeine and insomnia don’t mix well.

An Honest Modern-Day Kids’ Fashion Paper Doll

Posted by on May 21st, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Paper dolls have been around since forever, or the mid-18th century (close enough to forever). Little printed playthings you could cut out and dress up in coordinated outfits, luxurious new fashions, with PAIRS of the same socks and shoes, etc. Pure fantasy. It’s not that anyone who grows up really tires of fantasy and escape. […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 13

The Spitty Thumb

Posted by on May 1st, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Birds do courtship dances without a single lesson. A spider knows how to spin a web without ever having seen one. In much the same way (except not as nasty as spiders), I believe the Spitty Thumb is an action pattern that’s genetically coded into parents. It has its stimulus. Kids. They’re absolute schmutz and […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 5

PARENT OPERATION (The Game)

Posted by on April 23rd, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Playing this game could seriously teach parents some vital skills in raising their kids. First and foremost: PATIENCE. Followed by the close 2nd: the ability to tolerate sudden startling noises. There’s probably a whole grab bag of other useful parenting traits to be gained or honed in playing this updated version of the classic kids’ […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 10

LOLs: An Illustrated Guide

Posted by on April 15th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Some of the poor misguided kids these days use acronyms so much it extends to regular speech. I’ve heard kids say “el oh el” or “lol” in response to a joke rather than laugh. Creepy. Even if that kind of makes your skin crawl, a lot of us use the common laugh acronyms online and […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 6

An Alphabet According to Kids

Posted by on March 20th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Books and learning products for toddlers and kids can easily give one the idea that our children are being groomed for a future in farming or a jungle expedition. Some of the things chosen to represent the alphabet can be a little random and a lot a bit irrelevant. If you were learning a new […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 17

Types of Parent Heart Conditions

Posted by on March 6th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING Becoming a parent or experiencing prolonged exposure to babies and children may cause a variety of pleasurable and undesirable heart episodes.   Kids don’t make you feel anything you haven’t felt before. Delude yourself all you want, but they just don’t. However, they can act like emotional lenses, sharpening and intensifying […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 7

An Honest Guide to Repacking a Product

Posted by on February 4th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Faulty products, misguided impulse buys, kid rejection, whatever; sometimes life gives you lemons. But you paid hard-earned money for those damn lemons, so you’re not just gonna sit there with a puckered-up face and bear it. You need to make a return. Sadly, before you can make an exchange or a return, you can’t just […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 5

Laundry, A Parent Service Announcement

Posted by on January 23rd, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Maybe laundry can be loads of fun! (Yeah, even I want to punch myself in the face for that pun). Seriously though (not really seriously though), if you think of it as a game, a really simple game, that’s always the same, and seems to take forever, with no really great reward or achievement… okay […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 12

Diaper Change Threat Condition & Awareness Chart

Posted by on January 17th, 2014, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

  Some consider that one of the top rules of good parenting is preparedness. But those people are either crazy or selling something, don’t listen to them. You’re going to do a lot better as a parent if you do so from a solid foundation of reality. When it comes to the reality of your […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 9

Parentopoly, The Give ‘n’ Give ‘n’ Give Game

Posted by on December 30th, 2013, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

It’s likely you’ve played Monopoly before (even if you’ve never finished it), since statistically about 11 out 10 households have had the board game given as a gift one year or another. Parenting can truly seem like a game, too. How many times do you think one parent has said, “Go, it’s your turn!” to […]

VIEW POST
Comments: 7