How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Is there a word for the opposite of “educational”? That’s what these are. These diagrams illustrate why caffeine and insomnia don’t mix well.

Halloween Health-EVIL Ideas

Posted by on October 30th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Okay so, maybe these are all DEFINITELY terrible ideas. Based on a recent “Candy Confessions” survey from Crest, 86% of parents eat candy that was given to their child while trick-or-treating. We are all looking to fulfill our sweet tooth! Around the Halloween season, parents also seem to up their kids’ healthy eating and tooth-care […]

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How to Test Steak for WRONGNESS

Posted by on October 23rd, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, NOTEBOOK

Everyone has their preference, of course. And one could say there is no WRONG way to have a steak prepared for you, but the person who said that would be very sadly mistaken. However, in today’s day and age, it’s totally okay for people to like absolutely awful things. It’s 2018! You do you. But […]

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5 “Parenterms” That Need to Be Real Words

Posted by on October 19th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Parents make stuff up all the time. To sound like they have even the slightest clue, to shut some situation down or simply because they can’t remember the right thing to say. We need to adapt, improvise and overcome when it comes to raising kids. Taking words and MacGyvering them a little is no different. […]

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Pop-Tarts, If They Made ‘Em for TODDLERS

Posted by on October 12th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Why not feed your young ones sweet snacks based on the freaky foods they already go nuts for? Pop-tarts for toddlers can’t be the dumbest food product idea you’ve ever heard of. But if it is, than I’m even prouder for whipping it up in the carnival freak show of my mind. These would also […]

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Preventing the Impossible: Kid Stains

Posted by on September 14th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

M’kay. So maaaaaybe these aren’t such good ideas. It’s always surprising, the sheer number of inevitable stains that happen in a family. However, this surprise can sort of pale in comparison to the shock of HOW some of them happen. The other day, I was walking from the couch to the TV with a glass […]

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Anti-Kid-Sharing Snack Packaging

Posted by on July 24th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

It’s almost magical how kids can suddenly appear at the tiniest crinkle of a plastic bag. But it’s that crappy magic like a bad luck curse or the summoning of demons or evil spirits. We’re adults. We have earned the right to have our OWN snacks. Without our kids making us feel like we’re wearing […]

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How Home Tasks ACTUALLY Get Done

Posted by on June 22nd, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Thanks to Clorox for sponsoring this post and arming us parents with the products we need to get ready for summer fun, without the summer funk.   Everyone has had it happen. You said you’d do it. You set phone reminders that you kept arrogantly flicking away like annoying insects. For weeks, your spouse reminded […]

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The Dadliest Fragrances Ever

Posted by on June 14th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

While there are plenty of fragrances marketed to women and men, there really is a huge missed opportunity here to really speak to dads. Sure, the industry has plenty of scents for a wide variety of men. From the salt-of-the-earthy musk of a stylish lumberjack, to the suave stank of a cufflinked jet setter. (Whatever […]

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The Perfect Dad Shoe Doesn’t Exi-

Posted by on June 7th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

“The perfect shoe for a dad doesn’t exi-” [record scratch] Well it does now, kiddo! After extensive minutes of scientific analysis of countless dad clichés and stereotypes, The Perfect Dad Shoe™ is hot off the manufacturing grill! A masterful fusion between sneakers and clog sandals. That’s right! Yard work in the front, barbecue in the […]

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Bad Product Ideas: Condiments Edition

Posted by on May 25th, 2018, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Is your kid cuckoo for ketchup? Could your kid chug ranch by the ladleful? Well then, you’re gonna love these bold new food offerings! Or um… your kid is probably going to. You’re more likely to experience something a little less lovey and a little more gaggy as a response.   Condimentsicles Sure, most of […]

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