How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

My Wife Just Said… #219

Posted by on July 3rd, 2015, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“Your son just invented an imaginary friend… to blame his farts on.” –Elizabeth His name is Pete, apparently. And he doesn’t play or tell stories or fly or save the world. He just farts. It was him, that’s who farted. Not our son (who just ate half his bodyweight in strawberries). Pete might not be […]

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Scratch ‘N’ Whiff (FOR PARENTS)

Posted by on July 1st, 2015, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS, SNAPSHOTS

Remember Scratch N’ Sniff stickers? If you don’t, then I’m sorry for you, either for your being born too late or for your terrible misfortune of being raised by wolves under a rock. For those of us that do remember rubbing the scent genie out of its goofily illustrated, circular adhesive bottle on trapper keepers […]

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My Kid Just Said… #61

Posted by on June 29th, 2015, under "MY KID JUST SAID..."

“That was pretty funny, right, Daddy? … So… Are you going to post it on the internet? Ha ha! Because I think you should post that on the internet.” -Lucas (2015, 6 years old)   NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I swear he doesn’t really even know what that means! He’s just parroting what he’s heard his mom and […]

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“Of Bikes and Ants” : Convos With My 4-Year-Old

Posted by on June 25th, 2015, under EXTERNAL USE ONLY

Everything about death is always hard, including explaining what it is. It seems particularly hard because kids are so innocent, naive and positively bursting at the seems with alive-ness. They’re just starting out life, learning how to pedal and steer their little bodies and bikes. Of course, it’s necessary that they understand the concept, but […]

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Guide to Applying Sunscreen to a Child (or Wrestling a Croc)

Posted by on June 23rd, 2015, under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

We’ve partnered with Blue Lizard Australian Sunscreen for this post because who doesn’t want to “go Austrailian” on protecting our kids from the sun, mate?   Children are not always a fan of… a lot of things. Washing, seat-belting, eating, taking medicine, being sunscreened, wearing clothes. They’re often furiously disinterested in and agonized by all […]

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A Father’s Shadow

Posted by on June 19th, 2015, under NOTEBOOK

When a man becomes a father he suddenly casts a larger shadow. One that grows bigger with the years. One that poops and pees everywhere. Keeps him awake at night. Bangs things and breaks them. A shadow that follows him, watches him, learns from him and tries to do what he does, tries to stand […]

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The Little Terrible Runaway

Posted by on June 17th, 2015, under NOTEBOOK

  Sorre i haf to go a way. I Am sorre! I Love you But you Love me to. Buy Buy 💔 😢   He sat there sniffling on the sidewalk in front of our house. His long and bold journey away from the pain and torment of home was only the length of our […]

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My Wife Just Said… #217

Posted by on June 15th, 2015, under "MY WIFE JUST SAID..."

“After that episode of Game of Thrones I need to watch some Little House on the Prairie.” –Elizabeth We’re addicted to Game of Thrones. A LOT of people are. (Fear not, this is all spoiler-free.) It’s is an intense series, but it’s definitely not for everyone. Any given show can easily get the beefiest lumberjack […]

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Funny Ultrasounds Only a Parent Could Love

Posted by on June 11th, 2015, under NOTEBOOK

When expectant parents get a regular ol’ (non-3D) ultrasound, they can’t wait to see their little mini-me, but they don’t always expect to see an antique, black-and-white silent film of Skeletor as a baby, snuggling in a backpack. No one seriously says, “Awwwww, he’s got your spine, honey.” Or “Wow just LOOK at that pelvis!” […]

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Sleep – Scrabble Scribble #16

Posted by on June 9th, 2015, under SNAPSHOTS

Whether it’s a cruel wake up call at 4:00am or a brutally sudden interruption of an attempted nap, kids can be relied upon to bring about the swift extinction of the already endangered species of their parents’ sleep. A close friend told me recently that one morning his kids got up way too early (so […]

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