How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Couch Pillow Architecture

Posted by , under "MY KID JUST SAID...", NOTEBOOK

WIFE: Go thank Daddy for making dinner.

8YO: No. I will go thank him for the couch fort instead. It is the best fort in human history.

WIFE: Oh wow! Well thank him for dinner after that.

I loved making couch forts when I was a kid. My mom and dad loved my job as cushion contractor as well, apparently. Judging by the lack of any heat they gave me for it.

Now that I’m a parent, I can totally see why. Sure they wanted to encourage my creativity and blah blah blah, but also… “Oh, you want to expend some energy doing something by yourself that doesn’t require us feeding or entertaining you or worrying about what you’re doing outside? Go for it!”

And when my younger self left the living room more of a hurricane disaster area than a fort, having to put it all back together was a small price my parents had to pay in exchange for this self-sufficient kid time.

Now that my son has become a budding couch architect himself, we collaborate on building projects together, trying to make larger and more luxurious accommodations each time. We’ve even taken to using blankets and materials from the garage to provide us with beams and pillars for canopies for even more majestic pillow domiciles.

Let’s take a look at some of our construction projects over the past couple of years.

A Small Portfolio of Our Couch Pillow Architecture


Here you see one of our early projects, a quaint couch pillow bungalow, great for the middle school bachelor on the go.


Now, moving to a bigger plot, we are going with a simple but larger Ranch Style couch pillow home with room enough for entertaining playdate friends in an unpretentious atmosphere.


Aadvancing to a more complex but still minimalist Mid-Century Modern abode, this couch pillow home boasts clean yet slightly more dynamic lines.


Moving forward, we decided to tackle a more ornate Victorian style, showcasing a stunning turret with asymmetrical facade, and throw pillows to create decorative “gingerbread” detailing.

Encouraged by the success of our previous builds, we took on the challenge of a couch pillow mansion. This estate boasts a great room with a vaulted ceiling, flooded with light, for gatherings of multiple young guests.


Adding increased structural support, we finally achieved a couch coushion castle fit for a young king and his subject. Us. His parents. We’re his subjects, of course.


Soon, I’ll be able to add one of our builds as a bonus room on any future real estate listing of our home.

His design and building skills are obviously improving. He’s also learning about some of the basics of physics, like when he asks me to come join him inside and begins to understand some basics about space and mass, and how 6′ 1″ of this dadbod just ain’t gonna fit.

Still. It’s always nice to get the invite, as they say, even when you can’t make it (or fit inside), right?


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