How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

7 Side Effects Of Parenthood No One Talks About

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Listen, nobody is perfect. But that concept extends especially to parents. Not because we screw up more, mind you, but we have a living reminder of all of our mistakes and uncertainty constantly asking us questions, second guessing our every move and generally making it hard to think straight.

We get so wrapped up doing stuff, sometimes, that we don’t even realize we’re doing things right or even doing things at all. There can be a wonderful abundance of unconsciousness when you become a parent. It’s amazing.

Here now are 7 signs that you might have no idea what you’re doing as a parent! How many can you admit to?

1. Saying Stuff Like:
“I have no idea what I’m doing!!”

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Parenting often makes less sense than a cat putting their butthole in your face.

2. Phantom Thoughts
“Did I do that thing I was thinking about earlier before the other thing?”

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What were we saying about that? “The truth is out there.” -Files of some kind

3. Random Stuff Makes You Territorial

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Yes, that is my food. No, you can’t have my car. No, this is my sandcastle. Yes, these are my Star Wars action figures. Maybe you’ll watch the TV after I’m done watching this show.

4. Thinking People Are Laughing At You

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Heyyyyyyy BERTTTTTT!!!!

5. Playing Tricks On Your Kids

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Mileage may vary as far as cleverness and compassion.

6. The Realization That You’re In Over Your Head

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No, you’re waking them up, making them breakfast, getting them dressed, wiping their butts, packing a lunch, driving them to school, signing them up for sports, cleaning up things that aren’t your job, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.

7. You Get Infected With Get-Off-My-Lawn-itis

Is the music outside suddenly too loud? Do people use their technology things too much? Do you often think back to the good old days? Then, you have Get-Off-My-Lawn-itis!


One Response to “7 Side Effects Of Parenthood No One Talks About”

  1. Brian says:

    my child has given me short term memory loss so bad that I have short term memory loss

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