How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Nostrilizers: Bad Product Idea #17


Nostrilizers the smell expanders

The world has nose plugs, ear plugs and sleep blindfolds for keeping the senses at bay. These are all so negative, though. What of the joys of life? We’ve got binoculars for our eyes, headphones for our ears and seasoning for our tongues, but what of the delights of the nose?

Imagine if you could take a regular ol’ whiff of something good and amplify it, whipping it into an absolute SMELLNADO!

Introducing Nostrilizers. Your discreet, little scent-enhancing friends. They snuggle up comfortably in each of your nostrils, expanding your passages to deliver TWICE the air flow! All without the embarrassment of other clunky nostril-expanding products designed for snoring or medical emergencies.

You see, the concept behind these brilliant nasal inserts is really stupid simple, but also smart! Don’t worry though, not too smart! It doesn’t take a mathematician to know that TWO is twice as good as only ONE of a good thing.

The makers of Nostrilizers also brought you Kid Freshener, because sometimes kids are little stink factories.

WARNING: Nostrilized parents or people exposed to the presence of children, landfills, or pepper factories may risk… unpleasantness. Nostrilizers should never be worn in elevators, public restrooms, alleys or other enclosed or potential stank-contaminated places. It is inadvisable to use Nostrilizers on any Wednesday following Taco Tuesday. Some studies have allegedly show that prolonged use of Nostrilizers can result in permanent nostril enlargement or the condition known as OPSD (obsessive pumpkin spice disorder).


Warning schmorning. Whatever, right? Most people barely have the time these days to stop and smell the roses, but at least Notrilizers can now make it twice as sweet when you do. It they really existed, that is.

See All the Bad Product Ideas
Thongies Diaper Thongs, Tranquoo Child Anti-Wakefulness System, Baby Hjölster, and much much more.

Follow us on Facebook. It does’s smell good, but the important thing is it doesn’t smell bad.


Leave a Reply