If time travel were possible you can bet that most of the travelers would be parents desperately seeking to undo things that have happened or check up on their kids down the line. We live in a constant state of hindsight and it’s honestly the lamest superpower anyone could have.
Today, we’ve partnered with Lifelock to give you an inside look into every way we’d turn back time, childproof the world or wish we’d known things before they happened.
Childproofing After A Head Bonk
You feel it IN YOUR SOUL when your child hurts themselves. And head injuries are the worst. Which is why you immediately go out, buy all the things and turn your house into a bouncy castle made of marshmallows and regret.
Bib/Poncho After Ruined Clothing
Rain or shine, the kid storms will eventually pour messes somewhere in your house. Whether caused by freak science experiments or slippery grips, these muck sessions can hit you right in the budget.
Accidentally Injuring Your Own Kid
THIS. THIS IS THE EPITOME OF HINDSIGHT LASERVISION. You’re playing happily and then OOPS. Some kids take it in stride, others think you’ve wounded them for life. Regardless, the damage in your heart has already been done. I think need a centuple feels-heart bypass surgery, please.
Getting There 30 Seconds Too Late
SHARE YOUR 20/20 STORY!
Now it’s your turn! Share the stuff you wished you’d known or done before becoming a parent! Childproofing something, changing a diaper before a blowout — anything you want.
Post your #2020Parenting moment on Twitter, Instagram or Vine using the hashtag #2020Parenting, and we’ll embed them here all week! Every time we add your story, we’ll tag you so you’ll be alerted. See below!
I'd have put our antique dining chairs away. Now, thnx to my boys, they're just firewood. And that fire helps dry my tears. #2020parenting
— The Daddy Complex (@thedaddycomplex) June 30, 2014
“I would buy fewer nightlights and borrow more stars. #2020Parenting” -Whit Honea
— Jess Sanfilippo (@shuggilippo) June 30, 2014
— Aaron Gouveia (@DaddyFiles) June 30, 2014
— Brian Husted (@RandomDadisms) June 30, 2014
— Johnny T (That's ME) (@johnnytthatsme) June 30, 2014
— Dan Poore (@dwpoore) June 30, 2014
— Mike Reynolds (@PuzzlingPostDad) June 30, 2014
I'm still feeling guilty. If we'd tidied the garden better, this weekend's foot+rusty nail inclident might not have happened! #2020Parenting
— Henry Elliss ® (@henweb) June 30, 2014
Teaching them critical thinking too early. I rarely win an argument. #2020parenting
— DayParentDad (@DayParentDad) June 30, 2014
If I had it to do all over again, I'd listen more and bark less. #2020Parenting
— Josh Misner, PhD (@MindfulDadBlog) June 30, 2014
— TheJackB (@TheJackB) June 30, 2014
— Aaron Yavelberg (@sleepingonedge) June 30, 2014
— jeremy fulk (@fulkrocked) June 30, 2014
— Adam Black (@StayAtHomePunk) June 30, 2014
— The Dad Issues (@thedadissues) June 30, 2014
— John Joyce (@poochamungas) June 30, 2014
— Just a Dad 247 (@justadad247) June 30, 2014
— Russ Jones (@russjns) June 30, 2014
— Daniel De Guia (@deguia) June 30, 2014
— Brent Almond (@DesignerDaddy) June 30, 2014
— James (@JamesHudyma) June 30, 2014
— Brandon Klinetobe (@BJKlinetobe) July 1, 2014
— Brian Reasoner (@SBellasBigDaddy) July 1, 2014
— John Lindeman (@jclindeman) July 1, 2014
— Alan Kercinik (@AlanKercinik) July 1, 2014
Most credit monitoring companies aren’t proactive about identity theft. They alert you after the damage has been done. That’s like wishing you’d closed the barn door before all the animals escaped. Imagine what it would be like to have someone alert right before a parenting fail? That’s what Lifelock does. With identity theft.
And they’ve authorized us (which is funny since he hate being authorities) to give our audience a 10% discount right now for their service. Just use the discount code “LifeLockSafety” and you sign up. Super easy.
Disclosure: This post is brought to you today by LifeLock, a leader in identity theft protection. This post is my own opinion and my crazytalk doesn’t necessarily reflect the opinions of Lifelock or its staff. In fact, I should lock down my own life a little bit more before spouting off at the mouth sometimes.