39 Comments

• Tango says:

  at 5:56 am

  “Racism isn’t born, folks, it’s taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps. End of list.” –Denis Leary

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  • Chris Salvador says:

    at 10:13 am

    YESSSSSS!!!!!! I love that Denis Leary bit!

    Reply
• Dominique says:

  at 7:36 am

  This is amazing

  Mother of a boy with a little brown face 🙂

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• CobyLyn says:

  at 8:00 am

  Cool kid Finn. I wish the same thing all the time 🙂

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• Concretin Nik says:

  at 10:09 am

  Finn, you rule.

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• Johnny says:

  at 10:18 am

  If Isaiah had gone home and told his parents that he wished they all had white faces y’all would be freaking out.

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  • John E. says:

    at 10:29 am

    There is a reason for that. Because, if Isaiah, had said that, it would most likely be an indication that he was feeling like he didn’t fit in and that he wanted to be like everyone else. It would be a sign that he was already being conditioned that white is better than brown by society. Whereas, when it is the other way around, their is no societal push to feel that brown is better than white so it is an indication of genuine curiosity and admiration.

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    • Johnny says:

      at 4:57 pm

      You might assume that it’s “a sign that he was already being conditioned that white is better than brown by society,” but that would mean ruling out a priori the possibility that the comment was “an indication of genuine curiosity and admiration.” It’s an assumption that no brown-skinned person can find a white person worthy of curiosity and admiration, but that it is a sign of virtue when the reverse happens.

      Reply
      • John E. says:

        at 5:30 am

        I did say “most likely” because I am not ruling out the possibility that it COULD be curiosity and admiration (if reversed). However, brown children will almost always have had way more exposure to white people than whites to brown. So again, it is not as likely to be something they wonder at or about and that is why many would assume it was what I said (and freak out, as you said) – unless given more information.

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        • Johnny says:

          at 6:56 am

          I should be clear here. I agree with the many people who have posted here saying, essentially, race doesn’t matter to kids that age. That’s why I don’t see Finn’s statement as any sort of evidence of an enlightened view on race. It’s also why I don’t bat an eye when my 5-year-old daughter–who is of Chinese heritage–says she wishes she had curly hair, like some of her Caucasian friends do. I know if has nothing to do with a sense of inferiority, but simply because barrettes (which she loves) generally don’t want to stay in her fine, straight (but beautiful), Asian locks.

  • JeninCanada says:

    at 10:31 am

    Many little non-white kids already DO wish they were white because being white is so incredibly privileged. Don’t kid yourself (no pun intended).

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  • charlie says:

    at 11:10 am

    I can’t necessarily speak to how they would feel but I have to imagine that in that scenario, were I in their shoes, I probably couldn’t give less of a shit.

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    • Lashawn says:

      at 11:51 am

      I agree, they don’t care at all. That type of thing, if it happens at all, would come from young adults.
      My kids range 11-18 and they’ve never cared, I have battles getting sunscreen on one because he wants to get browner! Lol!

      Reply
      • charlie says:

        at 5:02 pm

        Lol. Also, I didn’t get a “I don’t like my own skin” in his statement. I would assume other parents would feel similarly.

        Reply
• Trea says:

  at 10:23 am

  I was the same way when I was little. My best friend was very dark skinned and I only knew that the more I was out in the sun the more I tanned. So I just assumed she liked to play out side ALOT… I thought maybe sense I had some Hispanic family friends that were very tan (because mexico in along the equator and the sun was closer/hotter there like them her family must come from some where hot to) maybe her family liked to spend alot of time in the sun. She thought I was crazy for asking what games she played out side and how often… but she never told me that it was her race that made her dark. (I was a VERY naive child) about a month later after meeting my school friend and hearing me talk about how she was odd for not liking the sun like I thought she did and asking why she was soo much more tan… my mom told me that it was because of her race. Then showed me where Africa was and that my theory that like Mexico, Africa is also a hot place with LOTS of sun…

  I love the innocent ideas children have.

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• JeninCanada says:

  at 10:30 am

  Very cute. From the mouths of babes and all that.

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• Ryan E. Hamilton says:

  at 10:46 am

  Hey…My son’s name is Isaiah…and his face is brown. Young Finn has hit very close to home, on this day.

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• DadCAMP says:

  at 10:47 am

  My son did the same thing when our neighbors moved in. The boys are the best of friends. Skin ain’t nothing but a color.
  http://www.babble.com/kid/hey-that-kid-has-black-skinthe-awkward-things-kids-say-in-public/

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• Jack says:

  at 10:50 am

  I hate the privilege talk nonsense, but that aside there is no doubt that racism is taught. You don’t grow up thinking that people who look different are not people or worthy of respect unless someone teaches you to believe that.

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• Mike Reynolds says:

  at 10:55 am

  I’m anxiously awaiting the first time my kids make note of race. If they ever do, may it be put as eloquently as this.

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• Father Muskrat says:

  at 11:07 am

  When I was in kindergarten, I told my black friend Robert that he was brown because he drank chocolate milk. I got sent to the principal’s office for being racist.

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  • Father Muskrat says:

    at 11:08 am

    I even wrote about it 5 years ago: http://fathermuskrat.com/2008/06/23/a-confused-boy-learns-about-diversity/

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  • charlie says:

    at 11:32 am

    I think you should drink more chocolate milk.

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  • Solar Serpent says:

    at 12:16 pm

    My sister, the only darker skinned student in a grade one class, was also the only child whose lunch sandwich was made with whole wheat bread, and not white bread.

    Her 6-year old mind concluded that the two were linked.

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• Tania Gonzalez-Hope says:

  at 11:26 am

  I am a Canadian-Hispanic and I went to a very privileged, semi-private, upper-middle class school. I had a teen mom, who also spoke with a thick accent and worked at KFC part-time while she went to school, so we weren’t like the other kids AT ALL. My skin colour was also very indicative of that.

  One day, in kindergarten, some kid told me she didn’t want to play with me because I was poo-coloured. I just thought it was something mean kids say and didn’t read too much into it, and when I told my mom, she got a little upset but didn’t explain why she thought it was hurtful. She just said she was sorry the kids were so mean to me and told me that one day, things would be better.

  In first grade, my older sister became great friends with a girl who had just started at our school. She was Jamaican and very dark-skinned. She looked so different from the other kids with her dark skin and dreads, and my sister was hurt that I didn’t want to be her friend.

  When my mother asked me why I wouldn’t play with her, I said, “Mom, she’s black.” My mom said, “So?” and I said, “She’s different.” I still remember the looks in my mother’s eye when she said, “You’re different too. You think you’re better than her?” I said, “So?” and she said, “Kids have been mean to you because you’re not white, and now you want to do that to someone else? Look in the mirror.” My mother was livid, and my seven year-old self had been had.

  I said, “What do you mean I’m not white?”

  My mother looked at me with disbelief and just reiterated, “You’re not white.” I insisted that I was, until she took me to the bathroom mirror and showed me for myself. “Look at me. I am caucasian. Look at you. You’re ‘una morena.'” And then I realised, for the first time in my life, that I wasn’t white. BAM! Epiphany.

  Lessons learned: 1) Be a friend to everyone. 2) Racism = Bad. 3) Tania is not white.

  Reply
  • Tania Gonzalez-Hope says:

    at 11:27 am

    I should mention that it was a predominantly white school. Maybe you got that from the story.

    Reply
• Marian says:

  at 11:32 am

  I love when little people see and appreciate the differences. If we could all live as free and unbiased as kids do…

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• Jo says:

  at 1:05 pm

  When my daughter was little she fell in love with a little baby doll that “had a brown face”. We bought it for her and she toted with her everywhere she went. Someone asked her why she wanted that ugly black baby, she had no idea what they were talking about. They picked up the doll and shook it in her face and said “This is a black baby”. She replied with a smile “This is my angel baby with a chocolate face”. I will remember it forever. I was so proud of her that day and still am to this day. God made us all, Red, yellow, black and white… Just like the song says! 🙂

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  • Danielle says:

    at 10:22 pm

    Kudos to your daughter. If I had been there, I would have ended up in prison. People like that… un real! My two year old son loves his Princess Tiana baby doll (the African-American princess in the disney movie) Because it’s a baby, and he’s entranced by other baBIES. iT’S AS SIMPLE AS THAT.

    Reply
    • Jo says:

      at 7:50 am

      It was a family member (in-law) and I had seen this behavior before so I chose to ignore it right then as to not make a scene and draw more attention to it than already had been. I wanted my daughter to forget it had even happened and just continue loving her angel baby…

      I did say something later to the person privately about never speaking to my child (or in front if me at all) like that again about anyone or there would be problems…

      Reply
• Laura says:

  at 12:54 am

  As a mom of three little cinnamon girls (their description they came up with) who have a chocolate dad (again, their description) I think Finn is one adorable kid, and it’s good you write these things down or you forget 🙂

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• Catherine Lloyd-Evans says:

  at 3:32 am

  My daughter had similar yearnings for ‘cool hair she could do amazing things with like those ladies’ on our holiday in the Caribbean. She loved the hairstyles.

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• Shari G says:

  at 12:16 pm

  I always laugh that my oldest son always gravitates to the kids that have a darker skinned than him. It’s just what he gravitates too, and I love that his friends are always a variety of shades of skin colour. It tells me we are doing right by him.

  My middle son said to me “Mommy I wish I had brown skin like __________. I know I can’t because I can’t change my skin colour, but I just wish.” I smiled and said that would be cool, but that I love the way he looks just the way he is 🙂

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• psychsarah says:

  at 12:17 pm

  When I was wee, I asked my mom what I had to do to get cool hair like my African friend. 🙂

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• Coco Cana @ My Tales From The Crib says:

  at 1:21 pm

  “He looks up ‘to’ this young boy…” -I’m not usually one to correct stuff on blogs because it’s sort of obnoxious, but this is just too perfect and too beautiful a message to share to the world to not mention it to you. 😉 P.S. The generation coming up (your guys’ children and my children included in that) gives me so much hope for our future it makes me tear up. They are simply beautiful human beings who see the world completely different than those who came before them and that is a good thing. I hope they continue to flourish.

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• fogamer says:

  at 4:45 pm

  Awesome! i also wish that for my boy.

  Reply
• Briab says:

  at 8:57 am

  My son, who also started pre-k this year has noticed the same thing recently. He told us the other day that one of his classmates had dark skin. It was the first time he had ever mentioned anything of the sort to us. We said yeah, some people’s skin is lighter colored than others. He didn’t really make a big deal about it and neither did we.

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• Justin Knight says:

  at 7:55 am

  That is beautiful. Too bad adults don’t always celebrate each other’s differences like that. By the way, can’t believe your son is old enough to go to Pre-K already. Time flies.

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• Christine says:

  at 7:57 pm

  I call my kids my beige babies. I am pale as a ghost and he is dark as night. My sisters both married black men and had kids as well. When we sing together our band name is Heather and the Beige Babes! Only have one pet peeve. My children are biracial not mixed. Dogs are mixed, not kids.

  Reply