How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Parenterms: “Dadgerous”

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Parenterms Dadgerous

Not everyone is handy just because they have hands, but when you become a dad you may find yourself suddenly possessed of the desire to build stuff. Even if you don’t have the desire, you’re still possessed in a way, like one would be with a demon. Possessed with some or all of the duties of making and putting crap together.

We all give it a shot and try to do our best to build and assemble stuff for our little ones. Some people are better at it than others. And by that I of course mean some are pros and some are absolutely terrible at it. For the latter, there is a special sign. It reads: Abandon hope all ye who require some assembly.

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12 Comments

12 Responses to “Parenterms: “Dadgerous””

  1. Bruno says:

    Where’s the “Order” button for a shirt with this ?? I want to give you money but I can’t !!

  2. Tessie says:

    In my family, I handle all the construction. However, my results are only as good as my resources.

    Had to build a kitty condo to keep the cat food of the floor when our boy arrives. The top level is slapped together, and the cats go up there reluctantly to eat. There were three constraints that led to this sad pile of carpet and wood:

    1. Lack of materials.

    Had only a fraction of my former building materials due to a sewage leak from the neighbors above, and moving to get away from said leak.

    2. Lack of funds to buy more materials.

    Having enough trouble paying for baby things and maternity clothes. Wood and screws are not a consideration right now.

    3. Lack of time.

    Had to build the sucker before I got too big. The only power tool I own is a Dremel multi-tool. It’s a little harder to saw by hand with a kid pressing on your lungs.

    Hopefully, the action figure command center (complete with zip-line for Batman) will be in better shape.

  3. Mary says:

    I’ve been resisting, so far. But, I am definitely possessed with this urge to build my son something fantastic like a gazebo. With a rooftop pool and waterslide. A secret entrance will lead to a basement room below where he can practice his ninja warrior moves and there will be bench seats with storage compartments for all his bugs and rocks and weird crap that I cannot determine origin or purpose of . . . Perhaps I should hire a contractor for this.

    • Andy says:

      Ha ha! I wanted to make a Hobbit hole for my sons, even drew up plans. So yeah, after a bit of research and estimating… Hobbit holes under a living tree are very very expensive.

  4. After 10 yrs with my man, I haven’t seen him possessed enough to want to be ‘handy’. Not before and not after the baby. Me sigh.

    On another hand, still work well and we are all alive lol

  5. Jo says:

    Love it! Again it’s funny side it’s true! My husband would not fall into such a category. He truly is handy…there’s a whole other category or him…but that’s another story altogether…

  6. QuirkyDad says:

    I’d like to make a suggestion – Dadgineer – building projects will take three years to complete but exceed building code and impervious to tornados, typhoons and alien invasions. Once projects built by a Dadgineer exceed their useful life chainsaws, grinders, fire or bulldozers may be required to remove the structure.

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