How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Parent Sex Pro Tip: Toys

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Parent Sex Pro Tip Toys Legos

There’s good advice and there’s bad advice. And then there’s advice that’s so weird and confusing, you don’t know which one it is.

One thing that’s certain is that sex deprivation, the lame prize in the cereal box of parenthood, can often make even the worst advice seem plausible. Or something. Maybe.

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Instructional Diagrams
Because instruction can be FUN! When it doesn’t really instruct you about anything.


10 Responses to “Parent Sex Pro Tip: Toys”

  1. Erich says:

    Lego in the bed? Ouch!

  2. I don’t like toys staring at me during nekkid time. The ‘reminder’ of the results of said time can be devastatingly distracting.

  3. BT says:

    Singing Barney dolls that self activate in the middle…. Nothing like the disembodied voice I Love You. You Love Me.

  4. Jen says:

    Are you guys preparing for your next book? From Co-sleeping to Passion – The Illustrated Guide to Getting It On.

  5. Elizabeth says:

    stray cheese fish cracker crumbs… don’t ask how it got there. It dug into my butt cheek, and HURT… Talk about distracting.

  6. Joanna says:

    Oh dear god….I’ll take awkward things being crammed up my ass while I’m tryin to get some, for $300 Alex! GEEZ!!! Legos, army men, friggin barrel o’ monkeys… Remember those? Yeah try finding one of those in your bed while you’re tryin to do the wild thing!! No thanks!

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