Ninja Parent Lessons: Tickle Attacks, Part 3 (Advanced)

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Ninja Parent Lessons Tickle Attacks Part 3 Advanced Techniques Tools of Torture Mystic Bag of Tricks Ghost of Torment Crazed Tiger Claw

I want you to know that I risk my life sharing this shadowy Eastern warrior wisdom with you. Not just because I’m continuously risking assassination from ninjas seeking silent but deadly (not that kind) revenge for broadcasting their proprietary trade secrets, but also because I can be life-threateningly ticklish myself.

The next shave I get could be from a ninja throwing star. The next hug I give could end with me curled up in a fit of epiticklepsy. Though, I must admit, the bladed throwing weapon thing would probably be an aesthetic improvement because I’m rocking the neck add-on to my beard more often than not these days. And I also have to admit that a grown man squealing like a little school girl and frothing at the mouth on the ground is probably YouTube’s next most-viral video. So… Moving on.

I do recognize that I may be endangering the lives and tickle spots of thousands, arming amateurs with techniques that are within their physical capability but far beyond their discipline to use responsibly.

This is the final and most advanced instruction in the ancient ninja martial art of tickling. Us it wisely. I’m risking so much. Tell my wife and kids I love them if I… did you hear that? Wait. I thought I closed that windo…shink-hauhggg!

““

Follow us on Ninjabook. Maybe it’s not Ninjabook, but our Facebook Page will never try to assassinate you.

All Ninja Parent Lessons
Part 1 and 2 of the Tickle Attacks, The Scissor Kiss, The Pillow Paw, The Ankle Claw.
 

22 Comments

  • ihopeiwinatoaster says:
    at 8:23 am

    “epiticklepsy” I had to give it some thought but, yes, that is very funny.
    Great stuff as always. I absolutely adore the look of your page.
    “epiticklepsy” – it’s a little hard to say, but, I’ll keep working on it. Cheers. Oh, and hey, uh…

    DUCK!

    Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 12:25 am

      ::ducks:: ::narrowly escapes bladed head-scaping:: Yeah, it’s the best i could come up with for epilepsy and tickle. A hard mashup indeed. Thanks for the heads-scaping up.

      Reply
  • JeninCanada says:
    at 9:27 am

    Hee! The “I’m not touching youuuu!” thing works on my son EVERY. TIME. He just goes bonkers over it. However, when he says ‘stop’, we always listen. It’s important for kids to know that even in play, when they say ‘enough is enough’ we’ll listen to them.

    Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 12:27 am

      It is important. But like any good tickle torturer, I really like to ride that line as close as possible without crossing into sob laughs. 😉 It’s an art. A martial art. 😉

      Reply
  • Allison Clark says:
    at 10:17 am

    My mother told my three year old that when she had enough of ticking to say “uncle”. The next time she tickled her, my daughter couldn’t remember the word and so yelled, “Grandfather!!” It is our new safe word.

    I, too, am ticklish on almost every spot of my body. I dread the day my children figure that out and learn how to effectively tickle back. Epic Battles of Tickledom are looming…

    Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 11:29 pm

      Looming indeed. My two older boys have long since crossed the threshold of knowing I’m more ticklish than they are. They like to demonstrate this when I’m placing a food order or at check out lines. It’s a good thing I don’t have a problem with looking like an utter fool.

      Reply
  • Larry says:
    at 8:50 pm

    You are a credit to humanity!
    My children – particularly my 6 year old – is very ticklish. I will miss it when they no longer enjoy being tickled. I love the squeal

    Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 9:10 pm

      WARNING: little kid laugh squeals are habit forming for parents. Tickle responsibly.

      Reply
  • Ted says:
    at 3:15 pm

    Very creative reminds me of the Pink Panther suprise attacks. In addition my kids always love growing a TickleMe Plant. They really move when tickled..search online

    Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 9:07 pm

      I LOVED those sneak attack scenes! 🙂 I’ll check it out on Google.

      Reply
  • Ninja says:
    at 2:39 am

    Wow you snuck the hairbrush in, and kinda snuck in the raspberries lol.

    Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 9:30 am

      YEEEEESSSSSS! I’m so glad you noticed! Ha ha! ::bows to fellow ninja without breaking eye contact or breaking wind::

      Reply
  • Nats says:
    at 5:56 pm

    how does one “tickle responsibly”?
    and whats the longest one should tickle a hyperticklish 10 year old non stop without a break?

    Reply
    • Ninja says:
      at 6:59 pm

      It depends on a number of factors…

      Reply
    • Andy says:
      at 10:41 pm

      I’m not really familiar with the Geneva Convention of tickling, but if you’ve ever seen the cult classic sci-fi movie Scanners, you’ll know you should stop before the kid’s head pops.

      Reply
  • Danielle says:
    at 1:50 pm

    My 2-year-old has a hard time taking the same tickles she deals out. She likes to get me at the clavicle.I was not aware I was ticklish there until just a couple weeks ago when she did it the first time. I have learned to combat the attacks, I must take an offensive approach and reciprocate the gesture. After a couple tickles back and forth, I usually win. Sweet victory!

    Reply
  • Green Belt says:
    at 4:40 pm

    Where and how do you tickle with a hair brush out of curiosity?

    Reply
    • Ninja says:
      at 1:33 am

      You pin their legs, and use it on their soles. I know this is old, but i hope it still helps!

      Reply

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