How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

Teaching a Kid How to Tie Their Shoes

Posted by , under INSTRUCTIONAL DIAGRAMS

Funny Teaching a Kid How to Tie Their Shoes

Teaching our kids how to do stuff is our job as parents. It can be difficult. Drinking our own urine can seem preferable at times.

One of the hardest parts of teaching kids anything is watching them do it wrong. Over and over and over and over. Some parent’s cannot even do it; they swoop in and snatch up whatever was upside down, wrong-side around, about to break or about to be inserted into a nostril.

One good way to go about teaching your kids may be to imagine YOU are the kid you’re trying to teach. Let’s pretend you’re back in school. Go with me on this. Now, if your school friend leaned over and asked you privately (behind their hand so as not to raise suspicion), “Does your teacher suck?” What would you say? (Remember, you’re actually the teacher in this case, pretending to be a school kid, because you’re reading something an insane person wrote on a website.)

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45 Comments

45 Responses to “Teaching a Kid How to Tie Their Shoes”

  1. Steve says:

    Great stuff. Yes, patience is tried in every conceivable plane of existence when parenting. The best parents I’ve seen manage to be successful through a delicate combination of non-judgmental observation of mistakes, repeated calm instruction, and many, many beers later that night.

  2. Nice work Andy. I especially like the vacant stare of the green bunny at the end. If one were trying to be all symbolic with images, that bunny would be the Daddy. In other news, where can I invest in Velcro?

    Vincent | CuteMonster.com

    • Andy says:

      Wow! I can’t believe you got that, let alone commented about the vacant stare! Half a gig of Internet points for you and me! Double rainbow.

  3. Courtney says:

    Loopeez and their bi color laces are the easiest way to teach kids to tie. Plus they are cute, cheap and kids learn in minutes

  4. John says:

    They kid figured out how to take off the velcro shoes pretty quickly. Tying shoes will be a challenge in patience….think they wifey will do that.

  5. Trisha W. says:

    I love this. I wish your diagram was open to pinning on Pinterest. I have seven kids and I could totally relate to this post.

  6. Anna says:

    Hahaha that’s the most retarded way ever!
    That’s not how you do the bunny thing!

    • Andy says:

      It isn’t? Enlighten us please!

      • Anna says:

        You do the bunny ears. And you say “First you do bunny ears” and then you say “the bunny goes around the tree and down the burrow, pull tight”

        or you do the “swedish version” and say

        “the bunny goes over the road and under the bridge, pull tight”

        • Andy says:

          Ah, but you see, that’s not nearly as funny and is also a lot more illustration work. ;)

          • Anna says:

            For illustration purposes I totally agre haha…besides.l.my son has a long eared bunny he’d totally get your drawing anyway :p

    • Elaine says:

      Hey Anna, wanted to invite you to join me and millions of others to “spread the word to end the word” @ http://www.theRWord.org. I grew up in a generation were “retard” was slang, but now more parents of intellectually disabled children find that even used in slang, this word hurts. It’s nothing I ever gave a second thought about until just recently I seem to come across this conversation more and more. Im not trying to get on a soapbox or infringe on anyone’s freedom of speech, just bring awareness and an invitation to be compassionate. Hope you take a few minutes to visit the website.
      Thank you!

  7. Ralok says:

    I still dont know how to tie my shoes

    thus . . . i have condemned myself to an existence of wearing crocs.

  8. Manda says:

    Honestly, most of my teachers didn’t outright suck. The majority of them were just apathetic.

    I guess I can’t really blame them. My own apathy is so intense that it’s been known to immediately suck away the motivation of every person occupying the room. I’m surprised I ended up graduating in the top ten percent.

    Now that there is FB, my de-motivational skills are able to incapacitate fellow housewives from across the country. Call it a gift.

  9. Josi says:

    Haha! I still tie my shoes with the bunny technique. I didn’t even know there were other options until I was in my mid-20s and someone made fun of me! And by then it was too late to change it. Why change something that works? My hands just do it without thinking.

    Love the idea of the two-colored laces! Seems like it would make the steps a lot easier to follow!

    • Andy says:

      I honestly didn’t know there were other techniques either, and I made this damned diagram! I didn’t even know about the bunny thing as a teaching method, I was just taught the actions and did it. Or tried to over and over and over. ;)

  10. Courtney says:

    Thank you Josi! The laces are great because they help kids see the left/ right lace. Plus I made them in the color and white so they look cool on the shoe.
    It’s funny what you said about how you tie. I’ve talked to a million people and so many adults tie using the bunny method. How you learn is how you do it for the rest of your life. The funniest is when grandpa’s show me how they tie using the bunny ears. So cute

  11. I was pleasantly surprised by how fast my kids picked up shoe tying. Showed them how to do it twice and they never forgot.

    Had to battle my son for a bit about buying Velcro shoes versus something with laces.

    It shouldn’t have been a big deal, but when I was a kid we would have tortured the guy who wore velcro and not laces so it was hard to not imagine that happening now.

  12. Stacey says:

    I love, love, love this post!! Definitely made me laugh! Having said that, am I totally condemning myself for saying that the bunny on number 5 looks like he has double-dangly-bit arms?!? Don’t ask me why I see that but I do…lol.

    • Andy says:

      Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Normally it might irk me for someone to call out an oddity in my illustrations, but that one just blew right past irk and went straight to making me laugh my ass off. I WAS GOING FOR A SAD HOBBES (from Calvin and Hobbes). Not Peter Penis-Hands Cottontail! Ha ha ha ha ha! Now I can’t see anything BUT that!!!

  13. MotherDuck says:

    Ha ha! Step 0 is so important! I’ve been knocked onto my arse too many times for not doing this first! Quite the illustrator you are! ;)

    • Andy says:

      Yeah, step zero is as important and the unzip fly step of going pee. It’s a MUST. Unless someone’s into that sort of thing… or something. ;)

  14. Brook says:

    Velcro, winner every time.

  15. Even in my most neurotically frustrated moments as a Dad, drinking my own urine has NEVER seemed preferable. Nope. Not ever.

  16. tommy riles says:

    Great drawing, as always, Andy. You’ve got skillz! By the way, I still tie my shoes with bunny ears…should I be embarrassed?

    • Andy says:

      I don’t think you should be embarrassed! I’m not. I never knew it was “the bunny method” but that’s how I tie my shoes. I honestly don’t know of another way of doing it. I really should hit up YouTube and see what alternate methods people use.

  17. LH says:

    A late comment.

    Frankly, I support NOT making a big deal out of a child not knowing how to tie their shoes. Who cares? We’ve had Velcro shoes for awhile. Let me make a couple of observations.

    First, there is a genre of parents out there I like to call “parenting Pharisees” who make out like you’re the scum of the earth if you try to do things regarding your kids in an easier way. Heaven help you if convenience matters any at all. They’re the ones that sneer at you for not getting the car seats that are 3-point harnesses, I mean they’re safer–they’re also a major pain to deal with vs the other design, and I figure the other design is still plenty safe.

    But you have to do it the hard way, not the easy way, even if the easy way is still darn good, else you’re a lazy parent. I think this is the same sort of thing.

    Second, frankly, as an adult I can’t STAND shoelaced shoes even for myself. They’re constantly coming un-tied and then when you double-knot them it takes forever to remove them when you’re dying to get out of them. I buy Velcro shoes for myself, and anyone that thinks they’re dorky and laughs at me can go suck on an egg for all I care.

    I have no problem with kids learning skills beyond working a DVD player or pushing a button, but I don’t think letting them wear Velcro shoes to make it easier for you or them is akin to feeding them cake & ice cream all day or sending them to a cult that teaches them that white people are the superior race, etc. People really ought to lighten up a little bit here.

    LH

  18. Andy says:

    I’m all for the road less travelled, non-conformity, whatever works does, idiosyncrasy, eccentricity and such, but your last line. Lighten up? Physician heal thyself. Take it easy. This is a happy place. ;)

  19. LRH says:

    “Happy place here.” That’s good. What I was getting at was comments I’ve seen elsewhere where people get very judgmental & nasty talking about parents who have kids who can’t tie their shoes, as if it means the parents deserve a “worst parent of the year” award and the child will end up helpless and embarrassed for life because of it. If people aren’t like that here, great, I’m all for that.

    LRH

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