How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

“Caillou” is French for SHUT UP

Posted by on May 31st, 2012, under NOTEBOOK

I hate Caillou

I am a lover of many genres and styles of cartoons. My love affair with them began immediately after my womb eviction and while perhaps not as diverse in selection as I’d liked them to be, the absorption of all those years of animated shows has made me into the man I am today.

And so, it is with a heavy heart and timid voice, that I must tell you…

OH, WHO AM I KIDDING?

I LOATHE CAILLOU.

Caillou seemed familiar to me. The Bay Harbor Butcher, perhaps?

For those who don’t have a permanent black mark on their souls from watching Caillou, it’s a cartoon show centered around an insipid four-year old Canadian kid with a sister named Rosie, two parents without any recognizable personality traits and a cat named Gilbert. No relation to “Gilbert” from Revenge of the Nerds or What’s Eating Gilbert Grape.

We follow this pseudo-Charlie-Brown as he whines, kvetches, barks orders at people, hurts himself, throws tantrums, causes trouble and generally shares his self-centered, pathetic, purposeless outlook on life to thousands of kids all over the world.

But let’s take a step back and leave the central character alone for the moment.

What is with the permanent acid-trip vignettes? I’ve never watched Yo Gabba Gabba but I have a sneaking suspicion that one of the monsters from that show is dealing LSD to the creators of Caillou. Are we just permanently in a dream? Does the narrator have cataracts? Are we just seeing things this way because he’s passed on and this is a replay of his life?

Caillou is purported to mean “pebble” or “bald head” in French and they apparently made him that way because HE REPRESENTS ALL CHILDREN. Do you know tons of 4-year olds without hair? I find it to be the first thing people talk about. And it’s not that I find his appearance abhorrent, I know plenty of bald-headed kids that are just adorable as hell, but with his constant psycho-giggles and the petulant behavior, I can’t have Finn watch it. Honestly, I think this whine-monkey needs a to be taught that sulking his way through his pockmarked existence (I can hear him screeching now, “GILLLLLLLBBBBBBERRRRRTTT”) is unacceptable.

Full disclosure, we watched it with Finn in the early days, unaware to his “charms” but after a few episodes we got the picture pretty quickly. Avara and I decided we weren’t going to show it to him anymore and found other great educational programming to supplant Whineus McShutface. We told Finn that the TV was broken when he asked about him more recently, but his grandma decided to play a little bit of it for him over Memorial Day this past weekend. I was taking a shower. I came into the room and my eyes went wide. I somehow managed to use the jaws of life (AKA a train set that we’d set up in the garage) to pry him away.

Anyway, consider this a Public Service Announcement about Caillou’s bad influence. Don’t let your kids watch Caillou unless you want a whiney, entitled, clingy little person to lay waste to your household.

-

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179 Comments

179 Responses to ““Caillou” is French for SHUT UP”

  1. Emmerson says:

    “Caillou is French for shut up” maybe the best sentence ever written and I’m mad i didnt think of it

  2. Holly says:

    I have never watched Caillou, but that video was hilarious. Now I’m curious if it’s really that bad, but since it inspired this entire post, I’m thinking that it is and I should just stay away.

  3. Grace Pamer says:

    First off can I just say this is my favorite part sentence of the year “My love affair with them began immediately after my womb eviction” :-)

    Secondly thanks for the warning. I’m a big cartoon fan too but the modern job lot don’t cut it for me. I look back on the likes of Ulysees and Dogtanian and the Muskahounds as the high water mark of great cartoons http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZ4c1X5ene8

    But then maybe that’s me showing my age.

    And glad you liked my graphic – my way of saying thanks for always entertaining.

    Thanks
    Grace

  4. Canadian Dad says:

    Oh Caillou, where to begin! I too have written about the fiery pit of hell that Caillou crawled out of, in order to make our lives hell! The first time my son screamed “Give me a cookie!!” I knew we were in trouble with that bald headed idiot.

    I would just like to say that on behalf of Canada, we are sorry for him. I would also like for all you Americans to know that Caillou is in no way a reflection on the Canadian people and you should approach us on the street knowing that if you try to mug us, we will most likely not fight back or scream obscenities at you.

    That is all. Chris

  5. OMG, best video ever. WE HATE CAILOU and agree with this entire post. His voice literally gives me shivers. We banned it, but my daughter is too smart for her own good and found it on the iPad netflix. UGH! –Emily

  6. Speakaboo says:

    For nine years we’ve been singing the theme song “I’m just a kid who’s four, each day I whine some more, I’m just a bastard I’m Cailllouuuuu.” I hated it when my daughter was young, and now that I’ve had another baby, I’m somehow being subjected to it, again. Between Caillou and Sponge Bob, I’m ready to set the TV on fire.

  7. Dave says:

    We were much like you in that we let our 3 year old at the time watch it a bit but could not stand the whines and complaining. Also the two parents that seemed to be the same person really creeped me out.

  8. braindonkey says:

    100%, emphatically, agree.
    The best caillou episode would involve the whole family slowly dying of dysentery. Then caillou would have something to whine about that I could actually agree with.

    Thomas the Tank Engine actually was a bit in danger of this as well. But you can’t stay annoyed when George Carlin is doing voice talent of 20 characters on a children’s show. Though the Baldwin episodes anger me. The movies are far less whiney.

    Of course on the flip side, our kid was watching futurama since she was 2… Probably not the best parenting decision, but meh, she heard big words an now has a vocabulary that ourstrips all her classmates by miles.

    • Marie says:

      Don’t worry my almost 3 year old LOVES Futurama and requests it all the time. He also loves South Park…. Not the best for a 2 year old to watch but still better than Caillou.

    • Lea says:

      Our parent oops show is Family Guy. Oops. It started cuz my husband would watch it while our oldest was in the room playing. Both my 5 and 2 yr old ask for it now. It is embarassing when trying to teach your son about jesus’s birth and he brings up “on family guy……..” ugh no honey!

  9. Christina says:

    I’m not a big fan of any show that looks like a slide show of a book with narration and maybe some voice acting and funny little animations.

    I don’t watch a lot of PBS or Qubo. Oh what the heck, the only show I like is Chuggington and with the arrival of a new Disney Jr. channel that my network doesn’t provide, the disney channel child line up is woefully (and horrendously) full of mickey mouse clubhouse and the trains are scarce. Once I figure out the time slots for Word World and Super Why, I’ll let the 3 year old watch tv again =p

    My mom used to ban a lot of shows because she didn’t like the behavior they encouraged…like Care bears and My Little Pony… For now, i’d be happy to see pure entertainment aimed at toddlers instead of these pseudo educational/interactive programs.

  10. Laurie says:

    I adore this post, because it is so so true. Caillou is the devil, I have babysat many kids and I feel like crying every time its on..ohhh rosie! Makes me stabby!

  11. Kelli says:

    I strongly agree with you. I’ve banned that bald bastard from my house since my 14 year old was little, I cannot stand that whiny kid. I loved the picture on Pinterest of the beheaded Gilbert!

  12. Laurie C. says:

    You know, I had never thought too much about Caillou, but now that you mention it, you’re totally spot on!

    Charlie, I URGE YOU to give Yo Gabba Gabba a fair shot, and not because I personally know many of the people who work there. That show is R.A.D. rad! Genuinely great artwork, and excellent music, it will be just as entertaining for you as it is for the little ones. It was intentionally set up that way so it would be enjoyable for parents to sit down with their children to watch together, and not to be just used as a babysitting tool (though, I am totally guilty of doing that). And I assure you that the host, DJ Lance Rock, is just as kind and friendly in person as he is on the show. He is the real deal.

    Yo Gabba Gabba beats the pants right off Caillou anyway!

    • Lisa says:

      LOVE this post (my husband and I totally relate) and love this blog!

      My son found an evil Calliou episode on YouTube and will no longer watch it on TV b/c he’s afraid of “Bad Calliou.” How lucky are we!?!

      BTW – Yo Gabba Gabba is freakin’ awesome! We have been watching it for a few years and never tire of it; I probably would have even watched it if it was on while I was in college. Also, no other shows teach such important life lessons as “don’t bite your friends…”

  13. Rob says:

    I don’t know who whines more Caillou or LeBron James.

  14. F-A says:

    I’m french speaking (from Quebec, Canada) and ‘Caillou’ stands for ‘bald head’ ;)

    He was originally designed this way because he was supposed to be sick, but that concept was never pursued, although his look stayed bald.

    Now, we don’t like him any better. Especially his voice, even in french it is terribly whining. And his ‘oh-so-perfect’ parents that never raise their voice……… gha !!

    But my kids loveeeed him. So we watched it.

  15. Jen P says:

    As a Canadian Caillou loather, I’d like to apologize on behalf of my country. Sorry for Celine Dion and Justin Bieber, too, while we’re at it.

    • Christina says:

      Awww…poor Celine Dion being grouped up with that. My mother found my Titanic theme music recently. I may go torture my husband with it now…

    • laneysmum says:

      Amen Jen P! A big bowl of poutine for you!
      Yesterday, my 9 year old asked me if Caillou was undergoing chemo….

  16. Julia says:

    Seriously, I didn’t notice it as much before I had kids. I always commented on how well Caillou’s parents handled him and I didn’t realize they were teaching “How to raise a whiny, annoying, selfish little child 101.” When I had my first son, I was made very quickly aware when my husband pointed it out to me. I was a little sad, to be honest, but then I realized that it was so true. My toddler has never, nor will he ever again watch Caillou. I do not need any more pathetic whining for no apparent reason in my world- and Caillou is made to make children more than annoying. So horrible, it could be a good show if the parents actually had any parenting skills whatsoever.

  17. I’M just a kid whose 4
    EACH day I grow some more
    I LIKE exploring
    I”M CALLLLLIOUUUU.
    SO many things to do
    EACH day is something new
    blah blah blah blah blah
    I’m CALLLIOUU, CAlliuo, callllllllliuuuuuuuuuu.

    Just reading the title of this post, the theme song begins to torture me. We haven’t watched this show in my house in at least two years.

    So thanks for that. :P

    • charlie says:

      Watch the video. It will help.

    • anonymous says:

      Noooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now the awful Caillou music is replaying itself unbidden from my memory. I can’t get it out of my head! Aaaggghhh! I’m going to need hours of heavy metal therapy to recover.

      Fortunately my 3 boys are now old enough to be more into Transformers and Avengers and Star Wars and Red Dawn….

  18. Paige says:

    I watched this with my little brothers and HOLY HELL did I reget it.

    I remember thinking “Whats the good of having a show about a cancer kid if you never talk about dealing with the disease?”
    Little did I know his only ailment was brat-a-suckis.

    My son will never lay eyes on that bald devil.

  19. Erin says:

    THANK YOU! I am relieved to know that I’m not the only one who thinks Caillou is one of the most irritating children on television (which says A LOT if you’ve ever had to watch the newest shows aimed at preteens). I don’t let my little ones watch the show specifically because I don’t want them to pick up his whiney tendencies. He’s just such a brat!

  20. jetts31 says:

    Caillou is the devil incarnate. Every parent with kids in the age bracket that might watch him should be warned. Like if they were entering a restricted fly zone.

  21. Kristin says:

    I like him. There, I said it. In fact, we found a couple of books in which Caillou isn’t such a goody-two-shoes, and we were ecstatic. I see why he’s annoying as a character, but I find Spongebob much more disturbing.

    And Charlie Brown has very little hair.

    • Paige says:

      I hate sponge bob too.
      And bob the builder.
      Thomas pisses me off sometimes, but is mostly tolerable.

    • Matt's Mom says:

      I like him too. Honestly, he is a bit whiney but he does seem to represent EVERY kid I have ever met’s behavior whether you like it or not. I would much rather my kids watch this than Spongebob or Futurama or Southpark or whatever crazy nonsense some of the above horrible parents expose their children too. The show seems to have good, everyday situations and explains in a way that a preschooler can understand. My kid rarely watches t.v. but when he does, it’s something from PBS more than likely. Not to mention, there’s this….

      “A 2011 study conducted at the University of Virginia, published in the journal Pediatrics, tested the show’s effect on preschool-aged children’s attention spans and cognitive abilities. The study had three groups of four year-olds each engaged in activities; one group watched Caillou, another watched SpongeBob SquarePants, and the third group drew pictures. After nine minutes, the children were tested on mental functions; those that watched Caillou had very similar results to the group that drew pictures, both of whom performed significantly better than the group that watched the SpongeBob episode.[13]” SO THERE!

  22. Klode says:

    as @Jen P says As i a canadian, i do apologize for Caillou, and Celine Dion, as i am from Quebec. I dont apologize for Justin Beiber as hes not from my province :P

  23. Tegan says:

    I also despise Caillou (Fresh Beat Band is more apt to make my eyes bleed, though), but we watch Caillou on Sprout, where for some reason, the episodes depict him mostly as a golden perfect child who knows how to make any situation better. Are these older episodes? Or do they just cherry pick? Because I’ve seen some episodes on PBS where the animation is crappier, and he seems a bit more of a brat. Weird.

    Also, ok… they made him bald to “represent all children,” but the rest of his family has brown/red hair and is white, so…

    Also, You should watch Yo Gabba Gabba. I promise you it’s better than Caillou.

    • Justin says:

      The older episodes did depict him as more of a brat. Tantrums and all. They mellowed him out in subsequent seasons but I still want to punch him in the face. Lol. Sad that I know this……..

    • NerdyLutheranChick says:

      Yo Gabba Gabba is what would happen if Sesame Street and The Wiggles were put into that Floops’ Fooglies thing from the first Spy Kids movie.

  24. Sboozer says:

    You mean- we’re not alone???!!!

    Sometime when we’re at dangerously high levels/ over saturation of “Bob the (dumbf****) Builder”, I turn to my husband and spell out C-a-i-l-o-u- and we both agree B-O-B is waaaay better. And by better, I mean that I’m not compelled to institute a “one show only” rule, cause, let’s be honest- that only hurts mom and dad.

    I’d like to add that as far as our 3-yo is concerened, Cailou has been “broken” since I went on maternity leave five months ago…imagine, pinned under a sleeping newborn, nursing, and healing… With a nonstop flood of that whiny little s***. If that’s not enough to cause a serious bout of PPD I don’t know what is.

  25. JoAnna says:

    Is it bad that I am shocked that so many people hate Caillou? I happen to like him. My 16 month old loves him. Sprout premiered a new season of Caillou which happens to have a different person voicing him. I have to admit that I don’t care for the new season. His voice sounds slightly deeper and much more annoying. I think that they made him even more whiny then in the old episodes. So be warned that if you hate “Old” Caillou than you are going to want to shot the “New” Caillou in the face.

  26. April says:

    Caillou is NOT allowed in our home! It is completely freaky that this 4 year old does not have hair! I think his family is secretly poisoning him, that’s why his hair isn’t growing! Even my 4 year old asked my why he doesn’t have hair. My response? He’s a brat. Brats go bald :)

    Other shows not allowed: Wonder Pets, Barney and Babar. Any show that centers around characters with speech impediments, drunk dinosaurs or spoiled talking elephants are just wrong!

  27. Whit says:

    We didn’t let the boys watch Caillou for the reasons stated above. He is one of the worst influences on TV. I’d rather my kids watch Charlie Sheen than some whining kid.

  28. Bebe says:

    Calliou has nothing on Norman from Fireman Sam. Either way, they both suck a big fat turd.

  29. And they say French parents are superior. Based on Caillou, I beg to differ.

  30. Justin says:

    I can’t believe you’ve never seen Yo Gabba Gabba! I share your loathing of Caillou though.

  31. You should try Trotro.

  32. kate says:

    This shares my sentiment 100%! I’m laughing so friggin hard right now! Had to read it to my husband and he is currently crying! The video montage really sealed the deal:-) pure awesomeness!

  33. Amy Lynn says:

    Ahh! So happy to hear so many others out there detest this whiny, nasty cartoon child.

    My boys have never, ever been subjected to him, as like so many others have said, he’s a monster and should be taken off the air! I didn’t want my boys picking up his snivelling ways!

    The US has many things to apologise for so don’t hold it against Canada, LOL.

  34. jess craig says:

    i’d rather let wyatt watch texas chainsaw massacre. okay not really. but kinda.

  35. Kelly says:

    I really don’t mind Caillou. Aren’t all kids whiny? I tell my son all day to stop whining and ask nicely. Lots of kids are self absorbed until they are old enough to learn to empathize; and the show never has the parents allowing him to continue behave that way. My son (3) isn’t super into it, but he enjoys seeing the cat, Gilbert and the kid’s family.

    I don’t know… I know it’s kind of in fun, and I haven’t been subjected to hours of whining to see the show, but the violent criticism seems wildly out of place for a simple preschool character with the goal of teaching kids that everyone has problems behaving, and tries to show ways to improve. There are definitely worse options out there.

    Taking it too seriously? (Me I mean?)

  36. Kevin says:

    Huh…and all this time I thought Caillou was French for “annoying little bastard.”
    I always learn something from HTBAD.com
    Thanks fellas!

  37. I thought it was french for I hate your stupid bald head? We expressed our disdain awhile ago on HooHas –> http://hahasforhoohas.com/you-know-youre-a-mom-when-caillou-ecard/

  38. Aika Sabo says:

    I hate that show too! The voice actor is horrible!

  39. Ceri says:

    So we hate him to! I did not get the hate until I actually saw an episode. We LOVE Imagination Movers at our house. (their music is RAD) and now that my son is older we are getting in to the Hub. He is now in love with the Aquabats Super show, which is super annoying. I was excited for it at first but after seeing it, the show is just plain stupid. (4.5)

  40. K-chan says:

    On behalf of my country, I APOLOGISE.

    - Canadian mom who hates Caillou too

  41. Ian says:

    I have loathed Caillou as well for way too long. My dislike for this whiny child was so great a while back, that I created this:

    http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a29/cheezstake/Profile%20Pics/Caillou.gif

    Thank you SO much for this post.

  42. Elizabeth says:

    Thank god my girls were too old for this when it came out. I remember feeling this way about stupid “Barney”
    Once there was an episode where Barney was pretend shaving with a popsicle stick and whipped cream. I thought nothing of it, until my two year old daughter came out of the bathroom and and nicked her bottom lip with my husbands razor!!! She told me she saw Barney shaving and though she would try it!! Stupid purple beast!!!

  43. Malbon says:

    Here in Canada, no gathering of parents is complete without the conversation turning to Caillou’s awfulness. I’ve seen and been an apologist for shows everybody hates, but I’ve never found a single human being who enjoys or stands up for this show. Yet it’s been on TV for at least ten years.

    As a cute side note, my daughter ends every song she sings with “that’s me!” like Caillou does at the end of his theme song. So there’s that, at least.

  44. Melissa says:

    Thanks for enlightening me to this evil little f*cker!! Although now I need to youtube it to make sure that when/if it comes on – I throw myself in front of the tv at ALL costs haha

  45. Never has a kid’s cartoon character been more deeply in need of a beating than Caillou. This whiny little bastard haunts my dreams.

  46. Yorda says:

    Caillou = annoying brat.
    Yo Gabba Gabba ? The character Muno = looks like a bumped up condom head(pardon me) but yeah, just my two-cents.

  47. Katrina says:

    I HATE Caillou! My son loves him….. /cry
    We are currently losing interest in him finally, but man once my son figured out it was on Netflix I was like oh no. Plus it was the ONLY cartoon he would sit down for. I am glad that he now loves transformers, and Ironman so much more……LOL!

  48. Krystle says:

    Amen!
    Yo Gabba Gabba may be weird, but it’s teaching a general feel-good attitude. I’m so surprised that such a sweet group of people known as the entirety of Canada came up with Caillou. Fortunately my son seems to feel nothing towards Caillou, which I see as a total blessing. I will watch Barney with him till my ears bleed as long as he stays uninterested in Caillou. And Spongebob. Don’t get me started on Spongebob.

  49. Stefan says:

    Sadly, my wife seems to like that bladie. However, I wil fight her tooth and nail for showing our daughter that stuff.

    No, she’ll rather watch futurama (I like all you other parents who allow this, too ;)), the simpsons, spongebob and avatar… hell if it comes to that, I’d rather write up something myself and play it to her.

    In my opinion, Caillou is one of the few things in life which DO NOT beat a kick in the face.

  50. he is actually a lot less annoying in French. It’s the only way I will be able to sit through it.

  51. Dave` says:

    The actual french phrase for shut up is “Tete Toi”, but maybe we can start using it as a substitute for shut up in English.

  52. Natalie says:

    so true. I put it on one day for our boy and my husband nearly pulled a hammy diving for the remote to change the station. This was before I realized I had turned on the anti christ for my child to watch.what a shame.

  53. Erich says:

    I never watched this but I always knew it was evil.

  54. BigSisV. says:

    my little sister loves caillou, and while its sometimes cute… its mostly me wanting to punch him in the face and say “man up lil twit and stop being such a whiny brat! and if you say gilbert one more time i swear its off with your head…”

  55. Denis says:

    Ok guess I have to reveal the secret. Here in Canada we actually play the show for our children as punishment. The reason why It looks like they are watching the little bastard is kinda like when you can’t look away from a burning car wreck. Honestly we didn’t even know the show was airing in other countries.

  56. Marianna says:

    Oh yes, I loathe Cailou too. LOATHE. This has got to be the most annoying cartoon ever created. I try to avoid it at all costs.

  57. Michelle says:

    As a new mama, I want to thank you for this!!!! I always see this show on the guide on our TV and always wonder what it is about. Thank you a million times over for this!! Henry is only 2 months old but he does “watch” cartoons. But, it’s only educational stuff….Caillou will NEVER see the light of day in my house!!

  58. GuardianofWinter says:

    Caillou is a prime example of how little television programmers think of children. I actually felt my IQ drop when my sister in law introduced this show to us as her children’s “favorite” TV show and the entire episode was based around a stupid ball!! IT WAS A BALL FOR CHRISTSAKES!!

    I don’t have television as I can’t stand modern programming but have started building a fantastic collection of older cartoons that both entertained and educated children. Fraggle Rock, Gummi Bears, Darkwing Duck, Tail Spin, and lets not forget Duck Tales and the Loony Toons collection! I love my classics! :-P

  59. Alexa says:

    I had a long talk with my husband before our daughter was even born about shows that would never, ever be viewed in our house under penalty of divorce/death/making him watch marathons of said banned shows. At the time, I limited the list to Barney, Dora the Explorer, and Caillou. Don’t get me wrong, there’s no little kid show that makes me go “oooh yes, let’s watch this 18 more times! Hurray!” but those were my no-fly zones.

    Our two year old daughter is pretty chill to watch whatever we’re watching as long as we throw her a Sesame Street or Super Why! once in a blue moon.

    It slowly melts my brain, but she loves to watch Pajanimals as part of her bedtime routine and it does seem to help chill her out, so the Pajanimals stay.

  60. Marian says:

    My daughter and her husband were deployed to Iraq for a year and I took care of my grandson for the year so I was subjected to the hell that is Caillou. While speaking on the phone to my daughter at one point I told her Caillou needed to have a hollow point put into his skull along with his annoying parents. I secretly wanted Leo or better still Clementine to give him a major a$$ kicking!

  61. John says:

    Has anyone else realized that Cailou wears shorts and short sleeves while his father wears a fricking turtle neck and pants, and his mother wears long sleeves and pants? Only in ass backwards Canada I guess……

  62. Deitra says:

    My nieces like Calilou for some unknown reason .I find him whiny and annoying ,luckily they haven’t picked up on his annoying habits they know if they do whine they’ll get a timeout

  63. Emily S. says:

    Hahahahahahahahahaha!

  64. Kevin says:

    My son is sick of caillou fortunately, so the current object of parental annoyance in our house is Diego and Dora. Why do they have to yell all their lines? it’s driving us berserk!

  65. Christina says:

    As a Canadian, I would like to formally apologize for the atrocity that is Calliou. He is NOT representative of a typical Canadian kid, nor are Hos parents’ disciplinary tactics typical of the average Canadian family. Please don’t think any less of us…

    My kids are NOT allowed to watch this drivel. I tell them I don’t understand whining. I will not submit myself to an entire episode of nothing but!

  66. revirdkcurt says:

    C’mon now, Caillou isn’t that bad. It’s Chica that is bane of all civilization. Happy happy birthday to you “squeak squeak” I’ve been nearly killed on multiple occasions. The PTSD comes from Chica… “squeak squeak” meh…

    “squeak squeak”

  67. Jon says:

    Hello All;
    This morning I sent PBS the following email in regards to Caillou. I think that if we all do something similar that something may be done about this bad influence of a children’s tv show. here is the email below:

    “To whom it may concern:
    In regards to Caillou;

    I feel that as a responsible parent, it is my duty to inform you that the children’s show “Caillou” is a really bad influence for children. After watching this show, my 2 year old son began to throw temper tantrums to attempt to get his own way along with becoming extremely whiney. Now as a responsible parent, I no loger allow my son to watch this show, but I feel that just because I do not allow him to watch it, that he wont see it at his friend’s houses because of it being on T.V.. I feel that this program should be removed completely from TV as it teaches children the following lessons: 1. Tantrums are ok and they get you what you want., 2. Being whiney and pouting long enough will also get you what you want if you do it long enough., 3. Sharing is not nessecary., 4. Parents will act the same no matter what you have done.

    This fact can be strengthened if need be by visiting any of the following user-based blog websites: 1. http://www.howtobeadad.com/2012/10864/caillou-french-shut ,
    2. http://mompocalypse.com/2012/03/28/top-ten-reasons-why-i-hate-caillou/ ,
    3. http://www.alwaysjacked.com/2011/02/why-i-hate-caillou/ ,
    4. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0262153/reviews ,

    or you could simply do a google search on anything relating to the “behaviour of caillou”, or “why I hate caillou”, or “reasons why caillou is a bad influence on children”. I could continue, but I do not feel the need. Please take this request seriously… This show is one of the reasons why children act the way they do in today’s society.

    Sincerely,
    A concerned Parent
    Jonathon”

  68. Eli says:

    I moved to Canada 5 years ago, married a French Canadian (they don’t all live in Quebec!) and am now raising a bilingual daughter. Trust me, I’m familiar with Caillou in not one but TWO languages. The books on which the character is based are great; they’re the usual picture with small sentence books for babies, not stories, persay. And there is NO whining in any of the ones I’ve seen so far.

    The show, well, the author pretty has it spot on. Of course I now pretty much feel the same way about Mike the Knight, but that’s another matter.

  69. Jess says:

    Ugh! Caillou is the penultimate, if not the outright ultimate, asshole of all ‘child stars’. We never let Dylan watch the show because if he didn’t learn how to be a shithead, he would have learned the word, ‘shithead’.

  70. Tom says:

    My favorite scene is when, during the “Mommy’s Day”episode, he sneezes and drops his plate on the ground. Mommy tells him “Don’t worry, some one else will pick it up!”

  71. Emily says:

    OMG, I effing HATE Caillou. My 2 year old loves him, and my older kids loved him when they were toddlers. I can’t stand his whiney voice. Did anyone see the episode where Caillou thought they were going to the circus one day, but it wasn’t until the next day, so he threw a tantrum while he was brushing his teeth? I wanted to punch him. OMG.

  72. Emily says:

    Here it is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsvlDVNtiJ8 Skip to 1:10 for his tantrum. I’m getting mad watching this, lol.

  73. Ramon says:

    I hate this show with a passion. My son loves it and I can’t get my wife to stop showing it to him. Whoever came up with this one failed society as a whole as my son does not behave any different but has, instead figured that whining is the most winning way to score attention. Not from me.

  74. Amina says:

    I’m American living abroad raising a Morocca-American Daughter. She is being taught English French and Arabic. I have a MAED-CIESL and I feel that Caillou in french is not whiny at all. Of course I have not seen an English Episode but the French episodes are actually very good and educational for very little ones. As an educator I have found that the French episodes teach manners and simple problem solving skills for infants and toddlers.

    Perhaps the English versions are just poorly translated.

  75. Coco Cana says:

    Yo Gabba Gabba is pretty awesome. I have to agree with a comment from above. Watch the one called “New Friends” (I think). It’s with Jack Black. If you are a fan of his it will not disappoint. And just tonight we got our daughter to eat something new by singing the, “Try it you might like it” song compliments of Yo Gabba Gabba. She was like, “Oh yea. DJ Lance Rock told me about that…hmmm – he wouldn’t lie to me…Ok.” *munch munch munch*

    And about the bald Canadian, Caillou jumped the shark in our house with that first tantrum he threw. I was like, “Zap! TV Broke!”

  76. Sarah says:

    Finally a kindred spirit! This little brat is like nails on a chalkboard to me. My step-son loved watching this when he was 2-3 and it KILLED me. Everybody else in the family thought it was a sweet show and I was somehow horrible for hating it so much. Now I have a daughter who’s 1-1/2 and I do not let her watch it. Or Elmo for that matter. We watch the ‘Old School’ Sesame Street DVDs specifically to avoid that little red monstrosity!

  77. Shain says:

    To be fair to the little shithead, his parents are inane, soppy, whiney, do-gooder, ineffectual knobs as well, so it’s not surprising he ended up such a git. He’s going to grow up into a self-regarding douchebag who hangs around bars preying on drunk girls because he thinks he’s entitled to that as well. Enforced sterilisation of the parents and put the kid in a correctional institution.

  78. Shain says:

    BTW, I LOVE the programmes we get here in the UK on CBeebies. There are some brilliant ones for numbers and counting – Num Tums is the best, and ones for phonics as well (Alphablocks). And some that are brilliant for getting kids up and moving around like whirling dervishes – Tree Fu Tom springs to mind. We even have a lovely programme for children with additional needs – it’s called “Something Special”, and it uses the Makaton sign language and a presenter you’d love to hate but can’t because he’s FANTASTIC at his job. There are probably programmes on the commercial children’s channels as well, but I deleted them from the set top box so my son didn’t have to be bombarded with gazillions of ads for crappy food and plastic landfill. But that’s another story…

  79. Tom W says:

    My wife, who’s doing a fantastic job screening TV friends for our 2-year old, warned me, vehemently, about this kid. So, I’ve only seen about 10 seconds of him total- enough to write him off as a “cheap Charlie Brown knockoff”- so, of course, I thought he was from China- and well, nobody should mess with Charlie Brown.

    But to hear that he’s a whiny, self-centered little brat that’s faking being sick-that just might be enough for the ghost of Charles Shulz to haunt the dreams of this show’s producers.

    And what is it with these kids in Canadian shows (that includes you, Dino Dan)? Is this what we can expect in the U.S. now that we’re so socially aware? I hope not.

  80. M. L. says:

    Obviously Caillou is not meant to be watched by adults. The show itself is from the perspective of a 4 year old. When you are that age, you do not think about “recognizable personality traits”… This blog is entirely biased, and readers should beware

  81. Kathryn says:

    BEST POST EVER! I despise this cartoon more than any other in existence, thank you!

  82. Zak says:

    I don’t understand where all this hate comes from. It seems most of the people commenting on this blog are bottling up hatred from somewhere and releasing it on a fictional cartoon child. I understand that watching this show designed for children under 4 can be annoying so why are you watching it? And if you say because you watch it with your kids then why don’t you change that behavior to reading to your kids or playing with them. I understand that parents need some away time, I have a 3 year old and a 6 month old and I am a stay at home dad but if I don’t like what he (my 3 year old, not my 6 month old) is watching I turn it off, not just so something else, and do something else with him. He When he lists his best friends he lists his two friends in the neighborhood, and Caillou. Some times he even refers to other kids from the show, like the little paraplegic girl who teaches him to hold his breath underwater, the deaf boy he plays with in the playground, the blind woman and her guide dog, his friend, Leo who will obviously grow up to be a bully, the shy girl in his class, Emma, and the boy with Down Syndrome who visited his class. Yes he throws fits and can be whiny in some episodes but with the exception of a few most of the time he learns that it doesn’t get his way. But the difference is that the way the show portrays it it is HIM who is teaching himself lessons. His parents are exactly what a 3 or 4 year old would want parents to be: happy all the time, friendly and 2 dimensional. When you look at this show through a CHILD’s eyes you can see it for what it is worth. If you are a parent or even just an adult watching this show and love it, sure you have something wrong with you.

    No show is perfect for kids, and I have to say there are WAY more bad ones than good ones. Some of the kids (and adults) my son is around are WAY worse of an influence than Caillou. Until I see Caillou hurt someone, steal, or lie to his parents without learning or without consequence I will let my son watch.

    Not to Author: I respect your right to your opinion and I admire your blogs. The one about “Ugly Parents” was amazing. I would love to hear more of your opinions and reviews on children’s shows and products, just understand I won’t be accepting this one as positive or rhetorically accurate.

    • Zak says:

      That was supposed to read “Note to author.” Sorry I didn’t catch that before I posted

    • Zak says:

      Wow, I should have watched the video before I wrote this. If any of you can say that your kid never acts like this I will gladly take parenting lessons from you. We as adults watch shows that we can identify with the characters. Why should our kids want anything different?

    • Elise says:

      THANK YOU!

  83. cassie says:

    I hate the show, but I’m not 4. My 2 year old daughter loves it, I let her watch it. There are wosre things to let her watch

  84. Kelly says:

    Ok-Caillou SUCKS but…Charlie it seems as though you really like the way you “sound” and maybe you need to pay more attention to what your kids are watching rather than your word choice! I mean really “love affair” and ” womb eviction” , clearly you are not responding to a child tv show here-maybe you need to evaluate a more adult venue.

    • charlie says:

      I’m sorry, but I’m failing to understand your comment. Is it too cold in Virginia? I’m responding in a hyperbolic way to my own frustration about a show with a character that is both entitled and constantly in need. The creators seem bent on driving home character flaws that seem less like learning opportunities and more in the vein of examples of teachable moments AWAY from how he acts. My son picked things up from this imaginary toddler that I wish he hadn’t.

      I evaluate the venues as I see them. And what’s wrong with my word choice?

      • Laura says:

        Many of you really should give the later, 2005/2006 episodes a chance – they are ALL about good modeling, no whining at all – very different, and much better for younger kids. There are DVDs with only those episodes too – my son loves them, and they are, if anything, too sweet! (So I like them too)

  85. Amanda Alkon says:

    I haven`t watched the 2012 Caillou shows but the ealier Caillou shows are cute, educational,funny where people of all ages can learn a lot. Caillou appears to be very caring to others.

  86. Laura says:

    YES – Thank you SO much for this. This is the only show we don’t allow our little one to watch – not only because it annoys us, but we don’t want her learning that whining and complaining will result in us coddling her and giving in to her wishes.

  87. The muskrat says:

    I thought it meant “cocksucker.”

  88. Aimee says:

    Thank you for this. I flipping hate Caillou with a passion.

  89. bgirlsquirrel says:

    I have hated Caillou for the past 10 years…My son liked Caillou, and once my son surpassed Caillou in age, I decided we wouldnt watch it anymore. Then seven years later my daughter arrived…and like magic the little bastard Caillou appeared on my television again…It was like punishment….some of the children’s television was like having old friends return, Teletubbies, Thomas is much loved in my house (and it was handy that my daughter loved Thomas as much as her brother did since we still had all the toys), but Caillou…good god.

    I found your blog after getting in an argument with my now 6-year-old daughter on whether Caillou is in fact Canadian or not. Thank goodness you wrote this. I was sure I was the only person to despise Caillou. I really tried to like him too because he is Canadian. I forgive Canada for Celine Dion, hell even the Biebs, but Caillou? No, Caillou is the only Canadian import I cannot like.

    :) Thank you for this, it made my day a bit brighter :) lol

  90. Laura West says:

    YES, I agree whole-heartedly with this!! Caillou was starting to influence my daughter to cry and beg for things, she would even yell “Gilberrrrtt!!!” at the cat next door! (Mind you, the cat was fat and doesn’t move much, so it wasn’t doing anything bad.) I’ve also stopped her from watching Max and Ruby; Max does so many things without consequence! Screw that damn bunny.

    • Jenny says:

      I also found this page by having the suspicion that he was Canadian. Then to find out French Canadian! I knew it!!! Since all my in-laws are from Canada it explained everything. I love Canadians, don’t get me wrong. Especially the Trailer Park Boys lol As far as Max and Ruby, I totally agree with the fact that it is equally as annoying. Where are their parents anyways

      • Nick says:

        A few years ago, we took our kids to a reading by Rosemary Wells, the original author of Max and Ruby. She had a suprisingly long rant against the evils of TV, and a poorly veiled hatred for the way the show has defiled her beloved characters. I wouldn’t have minded hearing it so much, if she hadn’t been directing most of her speech at the kids gathered to hear her read her latest book.

  91. Josephine Robinson says:

    okay he is awful, but answer me this what is worse dinosaurs on a train or Caillou, as an example of how Not to act?

  92. rob says:

    Caillou is oh-so benign, there are plenty of shows far more worthy of receiving napalm. Pick your battles.

    You’ve never seen Yo Gabba Gabba? You lose all credibility right there. I fear for the future of children who never saw Gabba whilst in the 2-3 years range. Don’t use Gabba to comment on Caillou when you’ve never seen it

    Inform from experience, which based on this article.. seems horribly shallow

  93. Elise says:

    My 2 year old loves him!! And I like the show who cares if his voice is annoying!! And ALL kids are brats at times if they weren’t this sh

  94. Elise says:

    My 2 year old loves him!! And I like the show who cares if his voice is annoying!! And ALL kids are brats at times if they weren’t this show wouldn’t be true!!! My son has learned SO much from him and never acts like him!!! I don’t see him affected at all I see him growing from it so I disagree with most of you!!!

  95. Lia M. says:

    Oh thank GOODNESS. Someone hates Caillou as much as I do! I suppose the look is going for a ‘children’s book illustration’ air, but if so, it’s those annoying ones that have no real plot or reason for existing that I always secretly believed were meant to make children hate books. The faces are pretty creepy as well.

    *laugh* To each their own, but it is comforting to see someone else doesn’t like it. :p

  96. roshanne says:

    OK, I’m years late to the party, but my daughter likes Caillou (she used to LOVE Caillou, but now, she’s kind of meh) and as excruciating as it is to watch I swear it’s the reason she says please and thank you. She certainly didn’t get it from us…

    FWIW, the show is slightly more watchable if you imagine the adults being really passive-aggressive and sarcastic. It takes surprisingly little effort and helps a lot.

  97. yvonne says:

    OMG!! This is not only hilarious but OH so true!!! I cannot stand his constant whining or anything else about the show!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

  98. it'strue says:

    As a toddler, my younger sister adored Caillou. Now, I must live every day with a living, breathing version of this monstrosity in my home. My sister is just as whiny and awful as Caillou ever was, and I just know his influence is to blame. HELP ME.

  99. Carol Gardens says:

    I cannot stop laughing. I had forgotten about the show,Caillou. My kids watched the show ,together,but they had to turn the baby-seat around so the baby’s back was to the tv–that was my rule. I left the room, until I heard them singing the theme song….For my children,Caillou was the naughtiest child they had ever seen, and they were mesmerized by his whiny antics—it was pure comedy to them!(when my kids whined,I would ask them to help me find my charming loving child with the pleasant voice that I lost!As I searched, I would explain how his,”…excuse me,Mom?…I was wondering if…” worked MAGIC on me!)

  100. TerribleFather says:

    I had a dream that Caillou was in front of a firing squad. It was great!

  101. BrillGalt says:

    _______Caillou is a Pansy, Future Nanny Statist____

    There I said it. Caillou is a weak, wimpy kid. He’s spineless and makes me question if he has testicles or if they have ever descended.

    Caillou’s dependence on authority figures to help him out will inevitably lead him to become dependent on the State when he is an adult; as the State becomes the ersatz family to people who never gained self-reliance, coping, and cooperative communication skills for handling conflict. He will end up voting for the predatory thugs (politicians) which will use violence to extract money from other humans and redistribute for whatever purposes suits the whim in the breeze of the moment.

    The most horrible impact of Caillou is his cartoonish behavior is assumed to be normal by REAL normal children; brainwashing an entire generation to become slaves of the State as they emulate Caillou in childhood and slip down the slope into adulthood. For the sake of the future, Caillou, as a show or any of its sponsors, must be boycotted so it will die a good death.

    Caillou is not on the path to growing up, but rather paving the dark, demonic highway to hell for the rest of humanity. He isn’t evil, but it’s his eventual belief that violent authority figures are a solution to problems that is.

  102. Sara Huizenga says:

    Every single word you’ve said – I agree with!!! Can’t STAND Calliou – such a little snot!

  103. Danielle says:

    My mom has an I hate Cailou rant frequently. I personally think Dora is a bossy like irritating cartoon also.
    I let my kids learn all their dance moves from the Backyardigans LOL

  104. Momto3 says:

    I haven’t read (only skimmed) all the comments so I apologize if this has been said but I urge you to consider Caillou from a different perspective. Yes, he is whiney and behaves more like a 2 or 3 year old than any 4 year old I’ve ever met but he is beloved in our house for one reason. His self-talk helps kids understand and identify their own feelings. We don’t let our kids watch much TV so were shocked when the psychologists who diagnosed our eldest (then 6) with an Autism Spectrum Disorder recommended we watch Caillou with him to help him better understand how others are feeling in different situations.
    Watching one episode I realized that so much of how we deal with our kids is abstract to them. “It’s not okay to shout at your sister. You need to say sorry.” is very different when you watch Caillou and here the narrator say “Caillou was very angry that Rosie took his truck and he grabbed it from her and shouted. He felt sad that he had made Rosie cry.” I’m paraphrasing completely but your get the point. For little kids just learning to identify and manage the many emotions they feel and those who take longer to pick up on the emotional cues of those around them, Caillou is a wonderful program! My son is nearly 9 now and still loves to watch Caillou with his younger siblings!

  105. John says:

    Glad I found this site. I hate Caillou so much I parodied his opening theme song with lyrics of my own describing what a whiny **** he is. LOL

  106. Nicolas says:

    It frightens me when parents think there is any educational value in TV. No matter how nice the message, music and images, TV is made for entertainment, and that’s what it teaches kids to do: be entertained.

    You want them to learn good manners? Use them yourself. You want them to be kind to other kids? Be kind to your own kids! You want them to share their toys? Share your toys!

    Kids learn what they need to learn from real-life situations in which they are personally involved, where relationships are real and matter, where their actions have consequences.

    None of that happens with TV shows. Kids can’t interact with it. They could pause it to talk about what’s happening, but they never do (be honest, how annoying would that be, you use TV to keep your kids out of your hair, don’t you?). It just captures their attention (the definition of the word “entertainment”) and smothers their creativity, curiosity and imagination.

    Caillou might be bad (I too hate the voices… ) but what I wrote applies to all cartoons. Please do your children and yourself a favour and turn off the TV. Get rid of the blasted thing. You’re shooting yourself in the foot if you think you’ll have more time to yourself by using the idiot box as a nanny.

    Take a look at this site if you want to learn more about how to use TV responsibly in your home:
    http://www.limitv.org/parents.htm

    • charlie says:

      Your extremism is cute. I don’t believe 30 minutes of TV smothers my son’s creativity. Lack or creative outlets and stimulus does that. I guess I’ll go live on an Amish farm and my son will be the next Picasso.

      • Nicolas says:

        Your response is a bit extremist too :-) You know very well that most parents don’t just give 30 minutes of TV to their children each day. The average is between 4 and 6 hours. If you manage to keep it to 30 minutes, I applaud you, but I have to wonder what benefits that gives you, beside keeping the kids occupied while you are on a phone call or cook dinner. I just get the feeling you’re being disingenuous, but please correct me :-)

        • charlie says:

          Nicolas, I’m just not a big fan of placing blame on one source for the woes of all children. TV is one influence. One. I can tell you about my personal habits and parenting style, if you like. But you are “frightened” by television. I know plenty of kids, myself included, who have found benefit in specific educational programs. Those programs were used to teach concepts like sharing, emotional recognition, identification, scientific methodologies, as well as academic premises. Real life is more important, I’ll give you that. And I’m not a fan of too much TV. But hating on people who watch TV and saying “None of that happens with TV shows” is a generalization. It’s condescending, the way you phrased it.

          Do you read or do things for solely for educational purposes? Are you devoid of the desire to be entertained at all times? I enjoy films. I enjoy books. I enjoy being entertained by how beautiful nature can be. Does this mean I NEED to be entertained? No.

          The real lesson is in the ability to create effects in life, not simply be the effect of life itself. Don’t become a slave to anything, TV or otherwise. That is the underlying truism.

          • Nicolas says:

            Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I guess my comment gave you only a very narrow view into my thinking. I don’t blame TV for everything (hence why I mentioned the importance of how we behave towards our kids). I’m not “frightened” by TV, in fact I grew up on all sorts of TV trash and somehow I survived it (I think!?).

            When I said “none of that happens with TV shows”, I was specifically talking about interacting with and reflecting on what is being served through the TV screen. How can you interact? You can’t ask questions or receive feedback, you have no time to reflect, the vast majority of shows are designed to capture your attention constantly. They wouldn’t be entertaining otherwise.

            Yes, I love documentaries that show the wonders of nature, that show the potential of human endeavour, that provide a stimulus for a new interest in a child. But I don’t believe that is what TV is best at doing. Books (good ones) can provide these stimuli too, and do it in a way that doesn’t entertain but educates. And they certainly don’t encourage consumerism along the way!

            And you’re correct, I enjoy entertainment. But I don’t see that as a basic psychological need. Just because something is pleasurable doesn’t mean it’s needed. I certainly don’t need to eat that donut :-)

            I agree with your truism in any case, and I’m sure we have more in common in our philosophies than we initially thought. My first comment was meant to trigger this kind of discussion, I’m sorry if it sounded condescending.

            If you’re interested, my reflections on TV have grown partly from reading “Amusing ourselves to death” by Neil Postman. I really recommend it!

          • charlie says:

            Not all stimulus requires or should be interacted with to be useful. I can learn a lot about a beehive by watching it.

            Donuts aren’t health food? GAH!

            I’ll check out your book rec though.

  107. yup, the title says it! I’m actually a kid, about 11 years old, and I used to watch cailou, but I stopped watching it when I was 6. because I thought it was for babies. but now that I watched this funny video, I can see that it’s for no one!

    thanks for the funny video! I keep that advice in mind. -p.s I think cailou’s dumb anyway

  108. yup, the title says it! I’m actually a kid, about 11 years old, and I used to watch cailou, but I stopped watching it when I was 6. because I thought it was for babies. but now that I watched this funny video, I can see that it’s for no one!

    thanks for the funny video! I’ll keep that advice in mind. -p.s I think cailou’s dumb anyway

  109. cailou is a wimpy little devil

  110. Jill says:

    Not to bring other shows into it, but doesn’t anyone still hate Barney? My old kids are 24 and 19, so we suffered with Barney and the denigration of Sesame Street from an interesting show into something…else. But, I actually even managed to miss the onset of infant television. Teletubbies creep me out. That’s a no. Barney is still on, and still makes me want to punch babies. I’m going to have to watch Caillou to see how revolting he is, now that you’ve piqued my interest. Thanks a lot. Right now, we just let our 1 year old daughter watch adult movies. Not porn, just reasonably clean movies intended for adults.

  111. Penny says:

    It’s HIDEOUS. Instead of informing Caillou that whining and petulance are bad, the parents merely distract him with a different activity. They are way too permissive and indulgent, and the only time they set a good example is during positive interaction with people of different cultures or with disabilities. Also, nearly everyone on this show has putrid dress sense. I get mad when I see the preschool teacher’s ugly overalls with the droopy pockets. And that curly-haired wimp facing Caillou in the above picture is like some village idiot. The only good thing about the show is the cat.

  112. Gerald says:

    I also hate the whiny brat. Did you see the episode where Rosie wrecks Caillou’s things, then he complains to Mom, who gets angry and tells them to solve their own problems, then Caillou backtalks, throws a fit, storms upstairs, reads until he sees Rosie, then he SHOVES ROSIE OFF THE BED AND OUT OF THE ROOM, throws her into the hallway, makes her cry, tells his mom to go away, lies to her, then is relieved when they’re both gone. It was banned, but can still be seen on Netflix. Also, to quote a passage from another website:

    “I have absolutely no patience for that little kid.
    And then there’s the episode of Caillou that I really hate.
    The one that I’m convinced is out to teach my children that I am the Wicked Witch of the West.
    It’s the episode where Caillou, in his four years old whiny voiced bald self, gets his little sister Rosie (who, in my opinion, got the good end of the name game in that family) OUT OF HER CRIB…
    As if that weren’t enough naughtiness, he goes downstairs with Rosie and decides to make breakfast for Mommy and Daddy.
    With Rosie.
    And the stupid cat.
    He manages to put Rosie and her full head of hair into her high chair without killing her or otherwise dropping her on her head.
    And then proceeds to make the biggest mess known to mankind in the kitchen.
    He spills milk.
    He drops stuff.

    He turns the tidy kitchen his poor mother slaved over the night before into a re-enactment of Hurricane Katrina.
    How one whiny little bald kid can manage this much destruction while his parents sleep soundly is beyond me, but look, I didn’t write the script.
    Clearly I didn’t…because when Mom and Dad walk into the bomb that went off in their kitchen, they smile and giggle and thank that little bald punk for making them their “favorite breakfast”.
    Because I will tell you right here and now that if my kids made that kind of mess…particularly first thing in the morning…the last thing I would do is smile and giggle…much less THANK THEM.
    No, I would turn into a flailing, yelling crazed wildebeest.
    Smoke might even come out of my ears.
    It would not be pretty.
    Not one bit.
    Granted, they do have a real Cosby-esque moment and tell him that he’s not allowed to do that anymore and that he has to help clean up…which he happily agrees to and does so with a giggle and a smile…which just makes me want to pull my hair out because that scenario is about as real as glittery unicorns and dancing fairies.
    “Henry, you do know that’s really naughty and that if you EVER did that Mommy would ground you for the rest of your God given life, right?”
    Now, I will admit that it would be sweet and cute if Henry tried to surprise me with breakfast…but I would only even begin to think that approximately 3.5 hours after said incident. And even then, only after a very large mug (or three) of coffee. And a good dose of yelling.”

    Don’t you agree?

  113. Jane says:

    You can change the words to the theme song to:

    “I eat puppies and I eat kittens and I eat babies, I’m Caillou.” It is fun to sing that to your kids in the mall.

  114. Led use says:

    No Caillou in my house!!! He never gets disciplined and has a false sense of entitlement. Booooo!!!! Caillou!!!

  115. Lisa says:

    Brilliant, absolutely brilliant.

  116. Moneybags says:

    Someone doesn’t like a show made for 3-year-olds. Let me go run tell the teletubbies!

  117. Jo says:

    My 4 year old grandchild has bad behavior problems. I have never seen a child act this way. I couldn’t understand how a child at 4 yrs. old could have a fake cry, a fake laugh, and whine constantly, have no empathy, be rude to all adults, does not think that any rules apply to her, thinks she can stomp upstairs to her bedroom to avoid anything she doesn’t agree with, and smack people in the face and think it’s funny and a game… etc… etc… etc…

    THEN ONE DAY CAILLOU WAS ON TV I STOPPED DEAD IN MY TRACKS AND MY JAW DROPPED TO THE FLOOR AND I REALIZED WHERE MY 4 YEAR OLD GRANDCHILD LEARNED HOW TO DO ALL THE TERRIBLE THINGS SHE DOES! She was copying CAILLOU!

    Some people say how wonderful the show is and their children love it. The problem is they learn how to be bad first. They are to young to understand that it is not ok to act like that. The show may be trying to teach children that some behavior is terrible and then tell them what they did wrong and teach them the “right way” to behave. But Caillou shows children bad behavior, that they may not have ever seen before. The children are seeing that “mommy and daddy” love you no matter how terrible you are, so go be bad and we will sit you down and talk to you about all the things you did wrong, it’s ok honey… What A Load Of Crap!

    I am really worried about my grandchild’s actions, I have four other grandchildren and plenty of nieces and nephews, and I have never seen a child this young, that acts this way except for Caillou… and and a few Teenagers lol….

    Thank You For Your Time…

    p.s. do you think when these kids go into therapy the parents can send the bill to the Caillou people?

    • yeayea says:

      Why would you compare your grandchild to Caillou when everyone is saying how much they hate him… that means they hate her too. Just saying.

  118. Steve e says:

    If caillou is bald to represent all children why are all his friends an ethnic mishmash

  119. Sarah says:

    Completely agree! Ugh I wanted to do a pause narration through the show and correct the parents how they should be responding to their Whiney brat of a child! Cheers to you for publicly pointing this out! I’m thinking of donating to PBS on the condition they consider removing this show.

  120. Sweddr says:

    Great piece you made our Top 5 Caillou Spoof list!!!

  121. Lindsay says:

    LMAO! Great post! Caillou is SO whiny! My kids love him though…so I just put on some tunes in my headphones and let them watch..they are almost 4 and I have described almost every time that, “See, Caillou is having naughty behavior right now…we don’t want to be like him do we?” and they say, “No mommy!” lol! (I have 3 1/2 year old quadruplet boys) So I have had more then my fair share of whining and tempers flaring…but as a good mom, I always point out what NOT to do! lol!

    On a side note Charlie…do you think you could do an equally awesome post on Dino Dan??? That show truly makes me want to break my TV…and because my boys are 3 and they love dinosaurs they love it…but I have a very hard time with an 8 year old boy’s WAY to active imagination in thinking he actually sees REAL dinosaurs…and it is just plain annoying! ugh! lol!

  122. VCR says:

    Hmm. It’s probably just me, but I see caillou as an interesting reflections if what kids are like these days.

  123. VCR says:

    Correction- Reflection of

  124. Mia says:

    My brother used to watch that show………my dad hated it! Did you know the voices of Caillou were girls? Let me tell you that made my dad even more determined to stop him from watching

  125. NRA says:

    I too think Calliou is awful. But some of the people posting here have suggested having (fictional) Calliou shot in the head with hollow point bullets, some dream of him in front of a firing squad, etc., offered up here for your amusement on how to have this fictional (albeit whiny) 4 year old boy killed? Even after Newtown? I guess criticizing is not enough, we have to insert violent imagery…what does that say about us? It’s possible to be funny without the faux violence.

  126. Melanie says:

    Alright, I will say that Caillou CAN be a BIT annoying..SOMETIMES but c’mon! I mean seriously! It’s a friggin’ kids show for God’s sake! And you’re an adult! You are going to extremes with this hating on Caillou! You have a picture of Caillou with a knife & a decapitated Gilbert! How messed up is that?! We as parents may not enjoy or like certain kids tv shows that our children want to watch but it does no harm to them. The original little girl (actress) who voiced Caillou died in a car accident, just thought you’d like to know some other history behind the worlds most horrible children’s show! EVER!

  127. Brittney says:

    It’s comforting to know that there is someone out there who loathes Caillou as much as I do..

  128. Hope says:

    The fact that Caillou’s parents leave him home alone with his sister though. A friend and I were talking about this (her youngest sister, age 6 was watching it) and she pointed out that both of them are pretty likely to burn the house down/kill each other/break everything that could ever be breakable in the house…

  129. Molly says:

    I thought Caillou was bald because there was something medically wrong with him…

  130. Ginger says:

    Hilarious post!!!! All jokes aside. He ruined our kid for a month!! He finally told us he was acting the ways that he was bc caillou did. We had no idea why. We have banned it from our home and after about a week of no caillou we really notice a HUGE difference. Curious George is what it’s all about!!

  131. susan says:

    my daughter LOVES caillou , and i appreciate it because since she was watching she learned how to behave better with her little siblings . although the voice is kind of annoying ….. but it’s ok if my daughter is fine with the voice while learning a lesson . From what i know HE’S 4 !!!!!what can you expect from a 4 year old , they whine they say “NO” at times , caillou is just like any other kids\4 YEAR OLDS!caillou may be french for bald head or something like that but his name probably was not so important\done at last minute … Also if you REALLY hate caillou then simply change the channel there is treehouse and TVO kids and i know there might be others . BTW my friend said caillou makes u dumb so that’s why i came here.

    • Ginger says:

      Susan it sounds like you’ve been hypnotized. I guarantee less whining if you go sans caillou for 1 week. Also this article and comment thread are supposed to be mostly funny…you should appreciate that. . Your comment is sooooo serious. Chill girl. ;)

  132. Taz says:

    Guilty admission… my wife and I change the words to lots of the kids shows when they are overly obnoxious (the way Diego enunciates EVERY other WORD! for example). My personal favorite is when Bob the Builder says “Can We Fix It?!” I reply “No, it’s f***ed!” AH the things we do to maintain our sanity around crappy kids entertainment. The new My Little Pony is pretty funny tho. Phineas & Ferb FTW!

  133. BP says:

    For the longest time I thought I was the only one that hated that little bastard. Then the wifey and I met other parents that hated him, too. Thank you for letting the world know what a prick that kid really is.

  134. Ducman says:

    DEATH TO CAILLOU! I finally got my daughter off of this show and onto Spongebob. At least I can watch that show and laugh.

  135. Staycee says:

    LOVE this. We watched Caillou a couple of times and had to keep telling our daughter that Caillou was naughty, disrespectful, and selfish. Took 3 shows, and we were done.

  136. Maryanne says:

    Goodness… You have too much free time…

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