How to Be a Dad

How to Be a Dad

A “Poopulear Reactor”


A nuclear reactor from poopy diapers

[ click here to enlarge the image ]

What in the actual hell is going on here? That’s what you might be asking yourself. Understandably.

That’s exactly what I asked myself when I found this “schematic” shoved between two stuffed dinosaurs guarding it in my son’s room. Now, I’m no physicist nor am I very proud of the fact that my two year old is having some trouble with the orientation of his letters, but let me see if I can decode part of this for you, as I try to figure out what we are both staring at…

“Figure A??: Containment”
This thing looks like a combination missile silo and geology experiment. But I think, if I can be so bold, that this is our diaper pail. My son has been obsessed with putting hand inside it lately. I had to lock it down. After a thousand times of him putting his hand inside the thing, I noticed it too. It’s emanating heat. Weird.

Have you noticed that? Some sort of chemical reaction is occurring in there.

I see he’s labeled the various echelons of material and it appears he wants to post a fan or a hose to it. Not sure what that’ll do quite yet. Let’s press on…

“Figure B(or 8)?2: The Grid”
Well, one thing is immediately obvious. Disneyland. He seemed pretty pissed when we didn’t take him to Disneyland for his birthday. Hmmm… Then, there’s a big sign pointing to our house. And several other green-looking houses too. I’d guess these are all reactors too.

There’s also a mysterious figure at the top that I haven’t quite placed yet. He labelled it “D4D4”. Not sure if that is code or an acronym, but he also mentions “poop”. No idea.

HYPOTHESIS: My 2 year old son is apparently formulating some infinite energy source out of our diaper pail so he can independently power Disneyland. It may be some back room deal with them so he can visit without needing us to take him there.

Or he’s planning a thermonuclear invasion of the Happiest Place on Earth.

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29 Responses to “A “Poopulear Reactor””

  1. Taylor says:

    This is hilarious, and as a physicist I can attest it is 100% sound.

    • charlie says:

      Maybe you can explain some of my toddlers principles to me? He lost me at caloric theory and the laws of thermodynamics!

      Be sure to pass it around to other physicists. He looks like he’s on to something here.

  2. John says:

    I think that’s Dada not D4D4. Also, either your 2 yr old is a genius… or his father is not. Who really drew this?

  3. Adam says:

    Did a two year old actually draw this? For real? That is impressive!

    • charlie says:

      Well, it was guarded by some stuffed dinosaurs in his room. Either he’s safeguarding it (since it’s unlimited renewable energy) or he has a mini Manhattan project in his closet.

  4. Matt says:

    I think the Code D4D4 is actually Dada crapping himself after the little Mad Scientist blew up the Magic Kingdom.

  5. andy says:


    Weapon of Finn Destruction
  6. dadvsspawn says:

    Sign that boy up for MENSA!

    Here I thought my 4-year-old was a prodigy…

    …oh well, back to the proverbial drawing board.

  7. Beth says:

    I’m thinking that is DADA and Dada is in deep poop for not taking him to Disneyland.

    be afraid, be very afraid.

  8. I got a 34 on my science ACT test, so I think I’m qualified when I say your kid is probably a genius. Not only are the colors and materials accurate here, but he places them in the correct atomic weight order. Everyone knows pee-pee floats on poop, and then fart gas on top of that.

    Aside from that, you have nothing to worry about because if he were building this device your house would stink like a construction site porta-potty.

  9. jessica says:

    Your two year old son did NOT draw that. It’s cute though.

  10. baltwade says:

    Your two year old is a genius, literally. My oldest daughter took part in a child development study and at two and half she could write her name and most of the alphabet. The researchers said that put her in the top 1%. Your two year old son’s drawing is far beyond what even a “gifted” four year old would do.

  11. Richard says:

    I think your son has figured out how Disney get’s its power. These poopulear reactors are sending power through a grid via a hose, and now he is looking for how to get there from the reactors…
    Love your site, very funny. 🙂

  12. Tory says:

    Whaaaaaaaatttt. I can’t even.

  13. Fade says:


    I thought it was schematics for a diaper pail powered rocket. On which you would obviously ride a cascade of turbocharged poop to disneyland.

    • nonparentinvader says:

      i agree thats what i got he is thinking he could get the pooplear reactor to blast you all to disneyland, also that is clearly dada who has fallen off the rocket in midair.

  14. Nadjia says:

    This looks alot like a —- esquisse before going to Illustrator to make it ! – designer mom ! 🙂 😉

  15. Yeah… there’s no way Finn wrote that. I don’t believe it. Unless you used that “My Baby Can Read” thing. It would still be amazing though… Hmm…

    (Also: everyone keeps saying that Finn is a genius, which he may very well be, but you can’t tell from this. Most famous geniuses develop weirdly, and they tend to have social disorders like Asperger’s…)

  16. lily says:

    I think he is planning on making a super stink bomb so bad you and the neighborhood will HAVE to go to Disney to avoid the smell.

  17. Natasha says:

    Actually, I think that says ‘Dada,’ as in a father, not ‘D4D4.’ So that basically means he wants to go to Disneyland, and like you said, you didn’t take him there for your birthday, so he drew you standing in poop. But crossed out above it says ‘fart.’ So I guess he thinks that the ‘poop,’ ‘pee pee’ and ‘farts’ are on fire and he needs to attach a hose and a fan to it??

    • Yiying says:

      I believe the hose and the “fan” are the actual parts from diaper pail. 🙂 Farts are not powerful enough to get DADA, it is burnt away. Haha

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